Goddess of Marriage - Episode 31 (KimJiCap)

kakashi: I have been looking forward to the next episode of GoM all week! Too much immature Heirs, not enough Men! Yeah, I have missed Tae-wook. Alright, maybe not Tae-wook, but my Schnuggiputzi Kim Ji-hoon. With all the Heiraballoo going on, my dearest baby might be feeling a bit neglected?! Especially since Kim Ji-hoon's mighty fine nose has been a topic on this blog AGES before Lee Min-ho's schnozzer ever was? (Yes, schnozzer is my new favorite word, thanks to JoAnne)
JoAnne: And mine is Schnuggieputzi!
kakashi: Oh yes. A very usueful German word!
kakashi: This show? Picking up speed again this week, though (or because) we are not focusing on the strives of unhappily married people. So --- I do wonder why it took 30 episodes, but hey! I'm not complaining. Today, I'm constantly rubbing my hands in glee: They evil bitches and bitcherichs are going down! So down! JoAnne:  Do I detect a wee bit of rum tea in your speech, dear?
kakashi: I'll need that for Episode 32 ... This here was written under the influence of some strong Vicks medication: I have a cold.

Episode 31

kakashi: The surprise of the year: SILDragon is back! And she is sugar-sweet to Ji-hye ... can we trust this New no-longer Biatch? When she gets up and sees her grand kids, MILDragon is truly happy and Ji-hye, who looks at this picture of grandmotherly love, probably thinks she's is having an absurd dream ... Sexy Prosecutor also looks as if he is seeing white rabbits once he appears at the breakfast table. I'm just glad he doesn't squeal or do anything else unmanly.
JoAnne: I laughed HARD at his little shock face, and also at DragonDad telling Fish Lips to remember her position and maintain some dignity. I'm very hopeful that she's in for rough days ahead.
kakashi: NewlyReturnedHouseslave has even cooked her FIL's favorite soup today, because she wants to make the traditional seaweed soup for his birthday the next day. To teach the children what is right and what is not. Urgh. Seriously. Stop it already! This is painful to watch!!! And Patron goes "ha ha ha"-this and "ha ha ha"-that while MILDragon is about to explode from anger and disgust ... and I fear I must have looked just as incredulous while watching this. Though a bit prettier, I hope.  
JoAnne: SO much prettier. And there's the whole 'not crazy' thing going for you, too. (thank you) Kitteh must know about this woman...I wonder if he can find pictures of what she looked like in her youth. I wonder if *I* can?
kakashi: Tae-wook looks at Ji-hye all "what the fook is going on here?" - but of course, she doesn't know either. We know though. Money, status, and the kids - and a very weak character made the SILDragon come back.
JoAnne: I disagree on the weak character. I think she's an excellent poker player, and like the song says - 'you gotta know when to fold 'em, know when to hold 'em, know when to walk away, when the game is done.' or something like that.  She's playing a long game, and her strategy shifts to meet the demands of the battlefield. I don't think she's giving up anything, yet.
kakashi: After the Breakfast from Hell, Ji-hye goes to see her SIL ... and the two have a talksie. SIL says she understands that Ji-hye (and the audience, believe me) thinks she is insane for coming back. She was very troubled by the decision herself even ... but she is doing it for the children. She isn't asking Ji-hye to understand - but she is asking not to be criticized. And maybe, after a while, Ji-hye might think about her situation again - and come to see it with different eyes.
JoAnne: I wonder if she has learned some compassion or if every bit of this was lies.
kakashi: In this crazy situation, MILDragon sees herself as the big loser ... she is outraged that the SIL-DIL should get the vice presidency, but her husband cuts her short as always. He thinks of his business first and foremost and doesn't even care one iota for MILDragon's fears and wishes. He shouts at her to be quiet in front of her DILs and leaves the house with the (soon-to-be) new Vice President. 
JoAnne: This moment ranks right up there with wet Taewook in pajama bottoms and wide open robe in sheer gloriousness. 
kakashi: Ah ... those were the days ......
kakashi: Luckily, MILDragon still has Ji-hye to harass. But, hahaha, she is so upset, she doesn't even want to abuse anyone. No, she wants to know which side Ji-hye is on. It's either team MIL or team SIL! This must be the first "real" conversation between the two. Unfortunately, it only lasts about two sentences, because Ji-hye's brain once again goes to panic mode and shuts down.
JoAnne: Can you blame her? That right there, down there, that face?  It's horrifying.
kakashi: Totally frustrated about her slowness, MILDragon goes even crazier than usual. I laughed. But I laughed even more at her sudden attempt to be BFF with Ji-hye! MILDragon, who thinks of herself as a genius, wants to join forces with Ji-hye so that SIL cannot take over the family. And how can this be done? Of course, Ji-hye must produce the Heir (oh wait ..... if she hurries up a bit, the kid can go and join The Heirs! As ... Baby Heir 2!). MILDragon has already set up a meeting with the nice Dr. Kim, the gynecologist. "So let's get along with each other, okay?" Wow. Seriously smart, show. Ji-hye suddently can have an okay life in Hell, without anyone having to change too much.
JoAnne:  Wait for it...wait for it... yep, there's the 4-year old temper tantrum calling names. Sure, Mom, I pick you.
kakashi: In the meantime, The Annoyance is trying to re-unite with The Snore, but ... he is in handcuffs and is being led away. Hahaha, this is still funny, even after a week. Her trying to stop the Tail Prosecutor by blocking the way like a kid is much less funny though. Seriously, give this woman some dignity (After that, she falls unconscious and doesn't wake up anymore for three days. (Seriously) I'm only mentioning her in the KimJiCap main section because Tail Prosecutor and handcuffed Snore run into Tae-wook at the office (who is baring his simply delicious under-arms). This must be the episode we see Kim Ji-hoon with his mouth open.
JoAnne: Who does that? Who faints for three days that doesn't get put into intensive care because oh, I don't know, someone unconscious for three days is probably in a coma? And why is she in a coma? Lack of oxygen because she's too stupid to breathe?
kakashi: It's shock, JoAnne. It happenes to very delicate Korean women.
kakashi: And it is not the first time I notice that Kim Ji-hoon is much shorter than Lee Sang-woo. This is a good opportunity to make a gif:
JoAnne: I amused myself making up their unspoken conversation:  TW: Dude, what the hell?  WUP: I didn't do it! TW: Seriously dude, you screw around with my wife AND my brother? WUP: I'm innocent, I tell you. And GROSS. TW: I wonder if it's better for me or worse for me that you're in jail? WUP: Dude, I know you hate me, but cut a brother some slack.  I didn't do anything. Look, this is my serious face. TO BE CONTINUED
kakashi: Back in his office, Tae-wook does some hard thinking (while his biceps bulks under the white shirt! I saw it! It wants out!). An underling comes running in and tells him what's going on ... it's about his brother's case - there is more evidence. This news hits him hard ... I guess he thought his family was safe again? He also hears about the construction business and the money laundering charges against The Snore and his Architect "Friend".
JoAnne: Plus it's a shit ton worse now because before, the political stuff, that was his brother, and yeah their name would be damaged - but now, this, the GROUP actually is implicated in illegal activity.
kakashi: Tae-wook remembers that fateful meeting at the family hotel, back in the day, when he saw his rival for the first time, and when he was introduced to him as architects helping in some Kang-family construction. Despite the assurances that he is fine, he is visibly upset by it all (but please note his arms below).
JoAnne: He does look delicious. Come here, Tae Wook -ah. I will massage your temples. With my dirty pillows. (Sorry, the new Carrie movie is coming out and I remember her crazy mother very well.)

kakashi: Meanwhile, Ji-hye is back at the doctor's. Her menstruation is back to normal, the whole baby-apparatus is fine. So, why is she not pregnant yet? Dr. Kim asks; is it because hawt Prosecutor doesn't come home and fulfill his husband duties in the sack? Ji-hye says no, that is not it (I do think she is lying). It is because she doesn't sleep well at night (no sleep = baby-making hormones aren't good?). The poor woman is still so anxious, she checks the alarm clock all night. Hahaha, not funny but oh-so funny. Alors, she is getting sleeping pills - even if Dr. Kim knows the MILDragon will not like it. If the MILDragon misbehaves, send her to her, the Doctor, and she will tell her who is to blame for the sleeping issues. And she warns Ji-hye not to become pregnant while on medication (oh no! Poor Tae-wook)
JoAnne: These doctors are awesome.  They are the only actually competent professionals we have ever seen in a KDrama, do you realize this?
kakashi: And before they part, the doctor says: Everybody has crises in life. Especially women who get married at her age. And stress with the in-laws is normal. But what will she do about it? Divorce is possible, but it is not the best solution. In any case, Dr. Kim promises to help her. When Ji-hye steps out of the doctor's office, Tae-wook calls ...  and the first thing he says is that he is sorry. Sorry, Sorry, Sorry. He can't come home. Somebody save this man from his job! She asks whether something has happened. He doesn't tell her what it is, but he says it is something big. Yeah. It's big alright.
JoAnne:  Do I tell her? Do I not tell her? Do I tell her?
kakashi: He wants to hear where she is ... upon hearing that she is at the hospital, he is alarmed. But she tells him that it was his mother who made her go - as she wants her to finally pop out that male heir, quickly, to contain the SIL.
JoAnne: I love that she actually tells him the crazy.

kakashi: He doesn't believe what he is hearing... His mother wants to have Ji-hye on her side!? Yes, but what side should she be on, she is asking herself... which will be more beneficial for her? He is upset and tells her to stop thinking about it already - no more stress for her! Don't take anyone's side and just live your life. He (the filial son) will be struck by Confucius' punishing lighting for saying this, but those two women are qualitatively different from her. So she cannot be on anyone's side. She must live her life the way she wants to. Ah, Tae-wook ... I hope you get a happy ending.
JoAnne: I love that he recognizes the crazy.
kakashi: Seeing how crazy things are, he says he will try to get home tonight. And she asks, if it is okay for her to go to bed before him if she falls sleepy. "Of course", he says. "I'll hug you when I get home" (My Tae-wook loving heart: melted)
JoAnne: And a hug is all he'll get, because there's a big sleeping pill shaped chastity belt tied around her lady bits.
kakashi: Oh. A stony-faced Tae-wook leaves the Prosecutor's Office next and I'm going "uh-oh" ... But! He is going to see his despicable brother, who is having himself some fun with a couple of women. Great entrance, darling!
JoAnne: I wonder how it feels to have an actual sub-human for a brother?
kakashi: After the wimmen have left, the brothers have a show-down. DickBrother is wasted, Tae-wook deliciously angry. He challenges his brother about his misdemeanor and, as an answer, gets a fist to the face (ouch: Don't hit him in the pretty face, you asshole!!) DickBrother vents his frustration about his wife, who has become Vice President, and his father, who has abandoned him. He wants to die! he says. Fine, says Tae-wook. Just die already.
JoAnne:  Oh please, God, yes. I wonder if this actor gets pelted with eggs as he goes down the street, because I don't think I will be able to separate him from this dispicable character and I wonder if anyone else can, either.
kakashi: How much longer does this have to go on until he realizes what he has done? Does he know that The Snore has been arrested? No, says the brother. But did he know that the other architect fled after the warrant for his arrest was issued? Finally, something dawns in that dick brain ... Who does he think will be next? Who is next in the line of fire, does he not know?! Tae-wook shouts.
kakashi: Oh yes. Now DickBrother gets it. And he is falling on his knees in front of Tae-wook, asking "what is going to happen?" in desperation, and Tae-wook says: "I think this drinking party you just had - is going to be your last one." Pretty Prosecutor can no longer be the shit-dam.
JoAnne: And he still believes that someone will/should bail him out of this.  His sense of entitlement is monstrous, isn't it?
kakashi: Tae-wook returns to the office, a look of pained determination on his face. He really needs someone to hug him and stroke his hair and ... I digress, but the thoughts are pleasant. The underling is back, and Tae-wook asks whether they were granted an interview. Not yet - because The Snore is being interrogated right now. Where The Snore, the honest-dumb creature, is digging his own grave. He says he has been friends with DickArchitect for 10 years and of course, Tail Prosecutor assumes he has known about the embezzlement all along. It does not look good.
JoAnne: I know you like him and I certainly appreciate the role he plays in moving this story along (finally after 30 episodes there is something new) but Tail Prosecutor guy is a truly terrible, worse-than-an-idol actor.
kakashi: I don't like the actor, JoAnne. I like this role (including the choice of glasses for him). This tenacious, dry, aboslutely houmerless machine of a prosecutor. He is justice personified!
kakashi: Tae-wook's request for an interview is granted - Tail Prosecutor allows it after underling whispers something in his ear. We do not know what it is, though I'm guessing it's nothing very pleasant for Tae-wook.
JoAnne: I am very curious about that.
kakashi: Tae-wook enters the cell (he does NOT take his shoes off, the rebel!). The Snore looks alarmed (I am guessing this is what his face is supposed to convey?) as the mean-looking Tae-wook walks up to him. And .... CUT! Wow, another cliffhanger! Show, you are doing good!
JoAnne: Somehow I don't think for a minute that Tae Wook buys into this guy being a criminal.

The Others

kakashi: FormerBitch is now Vice President. Clap, clap, clap! She holds this "Noblesse oblige" kinda talk and I am thinking that she is really cut-out to be a business woman and will be a good CEO. If ... things to not go down the drain now. Which they most likely will. 4 more episodes.
JoAnne: I immediately imagined her telling the family that the Group will no longer pay for that ridiculous mansion and that they need to move and down size. I would be satisfied if she just cut off all funds for Fish Lips.

kakashi: NamBamThankYouMam has a complete breakdown ... NewBiatch's promotion is the opposite of what she wanted, of course. And we see her afterwards, how she approaches the Prosecutor's Office. She has become everybody's ticket to hell. There, Tail Prosecutor is waiting ... and he has smelled blood. He wants to go in for the kill and will not stop until the whole Kang-clang is either dead or at least destroyed.
JoAnne: That pose. He did that pose last week and very dramatically threw down his cell phone and I laughed and laughed...
kakashi: Doormat ... please. Do not waver! Mansized Jaejoong is still around and still very much into her. He wants to take her to San Francisco with him. And why not? He wants her, he is hot, he even promises to be a big brother for her son. Go for it. Please. And thank you for not bothering us with the Niece or the other In-laws. Focus on what's important show. You can do it.
JoAnne:  ManSized Jaejoong came right out said I like you because you're old and you can be a mom to me. And then he gave her that kiss, so you know what that makes her.
kakashi: She should follow up that kiss with some fun in a big bed to show himwhat kind of mother she can be to him.

Final Thoughs

kakashi: No further questions your Honor.
JoAnne: Maybe Tae Wook and Sex Heir will turn out to be school mates and we can have a reunion. A hot sweaty basketball reunion. Except they're both skins.