18 March 2014


Bride Of The Century Episode 4 (A SqueeCap)

Posted by CM Shukmeister on March 18, 2014
Shuk:  How many people know about the curse?  How many DON”T know?  How many know and won’t tell? And what’s the better look: black batwing sleeves, or slim white wool blend with red shoes?
JoAnne: I think that depends on what you're going for, Shuk. Do you want to be a scary ghost, or just look like some random suicidal girl who hangs around at the beach all the time?
That's his rifle, but can he handle his gun?
JoAnne: That reminds me of a cadence from when I was in the Army:  This is my weapon, this is my gun, one is for fighting, the other for fun...obviously geared toward male soldiers, tee hee.


Shuk:  JangBitch watches through the spyglass as Bubbles heads out to check on the birthday boy. JangMama mentions not to trust Yi-hyun very much; after all, he’s only a half-sibling in a family of back-stabbers. JB doesn't appear convinced, but she’s going along with her mother. For now.
JoAnne: Nest of vipers

Shuk:  Bubbles makes it to a cross street in front of a convenience store, and sees a bouquet of white flowers in the middle of the road, and JangOppa sitting on a curb.  He’s already a couple of sheets to the wind when he quietly relates the reason why his family doesn't celebrate his birthday:  on his seventh birthday, he threw a tantrum when his mother forgot the candles on his birthday cake.  She was hit and killed in the roadway, and he found her dead with the candles in her hand.  The story doesn't jibe in my mind, but it does its purpose in wanting me to hug away his sad face.
 JoAnne: So what doesn't jibe? Let's compare notes! I thought the neighborhood was a bit downscale, first. Second, why wouldn't his mother send a maid or something to get the candles? Or just tell him to shut up about the damn candles, already?  Third: He was seven?  So allow at least a year for the father to meet and remarry (and that's fast, but hey, he needs someone to raise his son) and then a year for baby sis to be born...He's almost 10 years older than she is? And she's in her mid-ish 20s? Nope. Not buying that.  
Shuk:  I just figured she's lying there for hours and nobody did anything?

Shuk:  Bubbles is affected and sad for her OppaNotOppa, giving him an empathetic squeeze.  We all know how she feels about creatures who have lost their mother.  He looks down at their hands, then her face.
JoAnne: He's a little squishy love bug of misery, this one.
Shuk:  She all but carries him home, leaning him against the stone wall when they get to his front door.  He says her real name quietly, and cups the side of her face. The moment is broken  when a car pulls up.  It’s FirstBorn.  Bubbles is surprised, but he was invited to a party, wasn't he?   Just then,  our drunk birthday boy collapses against the wall, and Kang-ju becomes the  porter. They lever Sleepyhead into bed. Shouldn't they at least loosen his tie?
JoAnne: Isn't it MORE of a strangulation risk then?
Shuk:  Well, they could remove it altogether.  Or put him in the altogether. [shrug] Either works.

Shuk:  ChoiDad is listening to the Chaconne again, and tries to rip apart his late wife’s picture.  He can’t bring himself to do it, all while Wifey#2 is watching.  She walks away as his phone rings.  There’s nobody on the phone just the same violin solo for a few seconds before disconnection.  Uh-oh, some 30-year old revenge thing?
JoAnne: Is first wife not dead?  Is OppaNotOppa really a hyung to Cuddly Chaebol First Born?

Shuk:  HangoverBoy is awake in the morning and looking at the gifts left on the table. He smiles at the bubbly note left with the tie, but quickly sobers as he reads the note from the flowers left by JB, wishing him a happy birthday but saying she won’t come back right now.
JoAnne: Poor OppaNotOppa does anyone love you at all?

Shuk:  JangMama is with her daughter, having restocked her fridge. She receives a thank-you text on her phone, and she comments out loud that her oppa texts her everyday. She doesn’t answer though, and uses a second phone to talk to her her mother.

Shuk:  JangOppa is in the President’s office to collect some papers, and opens a drawer to find a piles of grocery receipts. He puzzles over them for a moment, then quickly pockets one when JangMama shows up. He gives an excuse and leaves,  but a spark of suspicion  has been generated in both their hearts.
JoAnne: I like that he's not part of the nefarious-osity.

Shuk: Bubbles goes to a restaurant to meet up with JB’s school friends. Flunkette is there, too. Flunkette opens the first salvo: her fiance should come to the restaurant to introduce himself to her friends.  Bubbles calls him, but he’s busy.  Flunkette snarks that he is so busy, even if he got a  call from the Blue House, he wouldn't respond.
JoAnne: Well I don't know about you but that would certainly put me in MY place: me and the President, not important enough for Kang Ju. I'm going to go drown myself in the Han River.

Shuk:  He’s in his office, going over a report, when he gets a thoughtful look.  Obligation or impulse?
JoAnne: Hunger pangs.
Shuk:  The group is leaving the bar when he shows. Flunkette’s WTF look is priceless. A fleeting smile crosses FirstBorn’s face when he sees Bubble’s happy delight. Does he even notice his assistant?  I’m pretty sure that smile is only for one person,  Squee!
JoAnne: They will make the cutest babies.
Shuk:  The group retires to the dining room, and the girls sigh over Yi-kyung’s good fortune as he acts the solicitous boyfriend.  Flunkette is quick to ask what should a girl do if her Mr. Right is stolen from her?  FirstBorn smoothly answers that waiting is a waste of time, but, nope, she intends to wait for that person to change his mind.
JoAnne: My desire to snap her in half and use her for kindling is growing stronger. I SHOULD feel sorry for her: she did nothing wrong by loving a boy and waiting patiently for her day, only to have him snatched out from under her. But her nastiness is just too much.

Shuk:  Bubbles is in eye-rolling mode when she drops her phone. Going under the table, she finds her rival playing footsie with her fiance. He doesn't appear to be enjoying it, but he’s not stopping her, either. Bubbles decides it’s time to go: after all both her betrothed and the woman across the table have to work in the morning. FirstBorn is happy to oblige, and everyone leaves the table.
JoAnne: Men never know what to do in these situations. But I remain convinced he was NOT happy to be on the receiving end and was grateful for the excuse to leave.

Shuk: Except Flunkette, who is searching for her errant shoe. Bubbles dangles it in front of her: It’s not her shoe on the floor, but her pride. Burn!!
JoAnne: It would have been better if she had taken the shoe with her and disposed of it somewhere. Without ever showing it to Flunkette.
Shuk:  Hee hee hee, that was my thought too.  Bye-Bye!
Shuk:  Bubbles tells JangMama about Flunkette’s attempts to break up the engagement. Mama goes icky sweet and tells her to do her best. Later, JangOppa looks at the receipt he found and thinks about what to do.

Shuk: Geez, it’s been, what, a day? And JangBitch is already out of bottled water. Any Seoulites out there know if your tap water is drinkable? JB heads out.
JoAnne: Because of course, why should it concern her that she's in the same neighborhood as her home?

Shuk:  JangOppa also heads out, but Bubbles tags along to get a late night snack. And just like that, our parties are the same GPS; coincidentally, both girls are wearing similar hats. JB catches sight of them first and hightails it out of the store. Bro sees her out of the corner of his eye. They head outside, but the cashier stops them; she left her bag. Only it wasn't her bag, but her lookalike’s purchases.

Shuk: Enter the nighttime chase montage. Jang Oppa doesn't see his sister, but Bubbles does. She stops in the middle of the road for the Truck Of Doom. Who misses when Oppa snatches her out of the way. And JB is gone. He yells at her that she is just as important to him as his sister.
JoAnne: I dunno...he's known her what, a week? Two? If I was his SisterNotSister I'd feel a little insulted.

Shuk: JangMama gets the call and tells JB to lay low for a while and avoid that store. Suspicion zaps between mother and son when they arrive home.

Shuk:  That morning, Bubbles gets a phone call from Mall Mouse, and hurries to meet her at Taeyang. A pink and white Kia Soul?  I don’t  think I've see that color combination in the showroom.  Maybe they have a Hello Kitty edition or something.  Mouse tells Bubbles that because of the work involved in the opening ceremony, they were planning on working late at a hotel.
JoAnne:  Hello I am Mouse, Private Investigator. I will alert you to all instances of potential misbehavior to further the plot.
Shuk:  Right away. Bubbles gets a notion.  The two parties in question get in different vehicles, so Bubbles follows her fiance to a vacation cottage, and sneaks up to see him relaxing in front of a fireplace.  She snarks that it will get hot enough, and envisions Flunkette seducing him.
JoAnne: She's more than a little invested in this, huh?

Shuk: She's freezing outside, but is still looking through the window when she gets a rifle pointed out her. FirstBorn wondered what the wild animal was outside. They have a chat.
JoAnne: So she didn't notice him get up, put on a coat, grab a rifle, and leave the building I guess.
She's bubbly, not bright.

Shuk:  She's embarrassed; he's incredulous.  If he was having an affair with his assistant, she would have never caught them.  Even so, he wonders why she didn't leak the rendezvous to the tabloids and demand compensation. She gets a little uncomfortable and decides to leave.

Shuk: FirstBorn goes into caveman mode, and slings her onto the bed before she can do anything. Boundaries, boy, boundaries!!
JoAnne: Time for some Bubble popping.
Shuk: She struggles as he looms. After all, isn't this was she came for? She tries to headbutt him, but he’s ready for that. He’s not, however, ready for her biting his wrist. He, of course, lets go, and she gets free. She yells at him to behaving so badly. She hasn't done anything to deserve this treatment. He fires back: she’s no different, wanting to be Mrs TaeYang Corporation but not Kang-ju’s wife. I don’t get the logic; I mean, if she were to knock boots with him, doesn't that mean she’s seducing him to get the position of wife? So her refusal is a good thing, unless, of course, you are too full of sexual tension to think straight.
JoAnne: No, because it means she wants the perks without the work. He accepts that marriage is a business arrangement, but he expects to get some benefit from it, too.

Shuk: She grabs her stuff and leaves as he grumpily sits back down in front of the fire.  
Shuk: It’s ugly foggy outside as she travels down a gravel road. She see a figure in front of the car, and stops suddenly. When she looks back up the figure is gone, but there is a sign post. She turns toward “Seoul”, but after the turn we see that the White ghost was holding the sign. Sure enough, she ends right back at the villa, and decides it’s too scary to try again.
JoAnne: Iryeong is a very much sparsely populated area between Busan and Seoul. In 1982, a drunk police officer killed 57 people and injured 30 some odd more after an argument with his girlfriend. Creeeeepy.

Shuk: FirstBorn is still sighing, looking at the bite mark, when she hesitantly comes back in. She asks him if he’s hungry; after all, they hadn't eaten yet. He walks over to the kitchen and tells her she’s pretty brave for coming back, since she doesn't know what he will do. She, in turn, tosses him an onion to peel. LOL. What do you think is going through his mind?
JoAnne: Peel your own damn onion?

Shuk: She calls in to JangOppa. He walks into his mother’s room to tell her and sees her cell phone. He calls the last unfamiliar phone number, and a strange woman answers. He hangs up just as JangMama comes out of her bathroom. He doesn't say anything about the phone, but she checks it and sees the call. At the other end, it’s JB’s but her mother had warned her to let the servant answer it.
JoAnne:  Leave OppaNotOppa alone!

Shuk: At the villa, Bubbles happily places the finished meal in front of Grumpy. He complains that it’s just fried rice, and after tasting it, tells her not to torture him with it when they are married. I think that’s the first time he’s used the “M” word.
JoAnne: I could go for some fried rice.

Shuk: She takes it away from him, but he snatches it back; since she made it he might as well eat it. Awww. He starts a conversation - what are her favorite foods? She starts listing them, then realizes they aren't Yi-kyung's, and backtracks to name hers instead.
JoAnne: She likes all the things Yi Kyung is allergic to, hahaha.

Shuk: She tells him the story of the bracelet and why she doesn't take it off. The atmosphere isn't exactly comfortable, but it’s not antagonistic either, and definitely the least formal meal they've had together so far. Progress! At least, until she tells him he has to wash the dishes, since he only peeled one little onion.
JoAnne:  Nothing like a chaebol in an apron to get the ol' juices flowing.

Shuk: He’s not the kind of person to order about. She’s not impressed, and stacks the dishes in his hand. When he turns to the sink, the leftover juice in the frying pan splashes all over her dress. Is it deliberate or not? His face tells me maybe...
JoAnne: See? Step one in the GetHerNaked plan.

Shuk: She’s in the washroom, wrapped in a towel and scrubbing the dress. Yeah, like this is going to end well. Sure enough, she steps on a piece of soap and ends up ass over teakettle. 
JoAnne: That towel is glued on though.
Shuk: He hears her screech and runs in to check on her. He completely disregards her state of dishabille and goes into rescue mode. With the pain in her neck, he decides to dial 119. Yes! No piggyback, no driving yourself, but an honest-to-goodness activation of the EMS system. Wow, Show, way to go against the norm!!
JoAnne:  Shuk disillusionment with EMS response in 3, 2, 1...
Shuk:  [smile] Since they don't even show an ambulance, I'm gonna pretend they were perfect care providers in a beautiful white ambulance that smelled of delphinium and had perfectly working equipment...[drifting off]

Shuk: He grabs a track suit and heads back to her. Without thinking, he grabs the ends of her towel. A split second later, he realizes what he did, and covers it with an explanation: he doesn't want any more videos of her ending up online, especially X-rated ones. She tells him to turn off of the lights, leading to a touchy-feely-handsy session as he helps her into the pants and jacket.
JoAnne: That sounds like a lot of fun, actually.

Shuk: At the hospital, she’s cleared with a soft-tissue injury and an overnight stay. FirstBorn wanders over to her bed just as she trying to get up to use the bathroom. He tells her to stay still, then grabs a wheelchair, and without a word, picks her up and places her in the now-correctly-oriented wheelchair.
JoAnne: What about the room, any complaints? I squeed a little that he could pick her up and carry her like that, aren't they about the same size? Hong Ki ain't the manliest of men...
Shuk: He starts pushing it, and casually tells her that she’s been making him do all kinds of things he’s never done before: shoveling, onions, dishes.
JoAnne: Waiting for sex.

Shuk: Mission accomplished, he’s sleeping in the next bed over as she watches him. His face gets bathed in shimmery light as his eyes open. She pretends to still be sleeping as he levers off the bed and checks her temperature. She tells him it was probably hard to sleep. He says, of course not, isn't that what he’s supposed to say? She apologizes, and he’s okay with it.
JoAnne: He is all kinds of cute though.

Shuk: Flunkette is going over some paperwork at the mall when she is hailed by IdolBoy. He wants to show her an internet article from a Monster anti-fan site that says he’s dating an older woman to whom he gave a hair clip. Hmm, what makes me think HE leaked that information? Flunkette gets pissed and decides Yi-kyung is the one who posted the article.
JoAnne: That would have been smart of him, but no.
Shuk: JangOppa is fretfully waiting for his charge, when she comes up the steps with FirstBorn. Kang-ju respectfully tells Hyung what happened. She’s clinging to him, but quickly realizes her mistake and transfers to OppaNotOppa’s sleeve. FirstBorn takes his leave but stares at the couple. She glances back, and he catches something in her face that makes him happy, even as he mumble’s “half-siblings”. What did he see?
JoAnne: He's puzzled by their closeness.
Shuk:  It's more to than that.  His eyes widen after she glances back at him.  He already thought they were "too" close, so what was the change? Maybe soju will help.  Well, it helps me, anyway.

Shuk: Once in bed, she tells JangOppa about her false suspicions regarding Kang-ju and Roo-mi. Her assurances that nothing happened makes him smile, and he tells her to rest for a couple of days. She thinks back to the club kiss and the hospital princess carry and gets all moony-eyed for a moment before she shakes herself out of it.

Shuk: Ahjumma is foisting a virility drink on her hapless husband, who grumbles she won’t let him sleep at night. Haha! Firstborn comes into the kitchen for a glass of water. Ahjussi notes he has been in a pretty good mood recently, and Ahjumma pops up. Of course! He’s in L-O-V-E! He chokes on his water by this thought, and he’s quick to deny it, but he is also holding back a smile. After he leaves, the couple speculates on whether he will have tragedy similar to ChoiDad’s. Dad overhears them.
JoAnne: It's not really a curse if no one is supposed to know about it.
Shuk: FirstBorn is smiling at the night when Dad stops by. They share a laugh over Bubbles. Choi Dad gets ready to say something but backs down. Was he going to tell him about the curse? Or to tell him not to worry?
JoAnne: Why would you take the chance?  So far two women have died on their wedding night. I'd say that's a pretty amazing coincidence in such a small family.

Shuk: ChoiDad has a dream that shatters: his first wife (not the ghost, by the way) smiles with love in her wedding dressing, but a stream of blood from her head rapidly covers the white with red, and he wakes up gasping. Wifey#2 has seen this before, and fetches medicine.
JoAnne: It must be hard to be her. Wonder if she had anything to do with it, though? That thought is unbearably creepy.

Shuk: She asks him how long before he forgets Wifey#1. He tells her that at one time he suspected her of the crime, but he doesn't anymore. They agree to speed up the marriage for their son’s sake.
JoAnne: I think you killed my first wife but not enough to not have sex with you and raise children with you. And then I changed my mind.

Shuk: Bubbles is cooking dinner when JangOppa arrives from work. She gets a call from FirstBorn: President Kaneko has invited the two of them to dinner. She claims neck pain to avoid it; after all, she doesn’t know Japanese. But later that night, she’s carousing with Mall Mouse at her rooftop flat.
JoAnne: If you tell a lie, you have to stick with the lie. How many times do I have to say this?

Shuk: Mouse wishes she had a chance to eat an expensive meal; a new restaurant near the mall costs a month’s rent for one meal. Bubbles scoffs that it’s any good and says she prefers her grandmother’s homemade raspberry wine to the fancy stuff. Doo-rim is waxing drunken rhapsodic: they’ll eat pork belly to their steak, ramyun to their pasta, and drink soju to their wine. That’s life.
JoAnne: Till you've the steak, the pasta, and the wine. Then it's shitty luck.

Shuk: The topic moves on to FirstBorn. Bubbles tells her about the less-than-flattering compliments from Kang-ju, but Mouse agrees with him. Bubbles has no sex appeal, but with a little, um, augmentation and adjustments she could be.
JoAnne: Why, exactly, does Mouse have that stuff lying around the MouseHouse?
Shuk:  Maybe she's got her eye on someone she works with.  Gotta make sure the girls are noticeable.
Shuk: Enter Sexy Siren with heavy eye makeup, long hair, and skin-tight dress. Mouse teaches her the lean-and-gleam, but before they can perfect it, a couple of thugs stop by. Oh no, Mouse, you’re our cliché Loan Shark Victim? Bubbles gets knocked down, then goes into Valkryie Mode. With a loud shriek, she lays about with a handy frying pan.
JoAnne: She reminds me of someone in that wig...it's bugging me.

Shuk: For some reason, Flunkette is in the neighborhood. Is she looking for the MouseHouse? Yes, and by the time she shows, the bruised bouncers are long gone. Bubbles ducks behind her persona and hightails out of there.

Shuk: On the way home PopSexy grabs sweet potatoes. At the same time, FirstBorn is perusing a cake selection. Bubbles hurries home but nearly gets run over. She starts to yell at the driver, but realizes it’s her fiancé! She quickly ducks around the corner of JangHouse as he rings the gate bell.
JoAnne: Aww, he came to check on her?

Shuk: She decides it’s time to play CatWoman and decides to climb the vines over the wall about the time he realizes who the strange yelling creature was.

Shuk: He yells at her to climb down; she snarks back not to distract, then, of course, slips and falls. To land on HotnessCushion. Kang-ju gets the wind knocked out of him, but all she can do is freak out about the bruised sweet potatoes.  He yells about his hand injury but just gets ignored.
JoAnne: You know how how the daytime talk shows they always say 'I didn't mean to have sex with my sister's fiance, it was an accident!' and we always yell, 'What do you mean it's an accident, did you slip and fall and land on his dick?' Well...this is how that happens.
Shuk:  They end up in a playground, and FirstBorn starts the interrogation. He wants to know how her  brain is wired, and it's her fault if he has a heart attack. She apologizes for not going to the dinner.  He wonders if she went clubbing, and whether there were any videos that are going to pop up.  She denies it, and tells him she was cos-playing with a friend.  She strikes a sexy pose and he averts his eyes, muttering that she'll end up in his nightmares.
JoAnne: They're only nightmares if Mom walks in when you get to the good part, FirstBorn.

Shuk:  She takes off the wig, and mutters that it's his fault, since he told her he only likes sexy women. When did he say this?  When he called her figure schoolgirl skinny.
JoAnne: Does the fact that he doesn't remember saying it mean he doesn't really think it?

Shuk:  He asks if she thinks this outfit suits her. Can everyone be sexy like that?  He startles when she starts yelling. She lost her mind for a moment, and knows how unappealing she is. in his eyes.
JoAnne: Awww, poor thing, it must have hurt.
Shuk:  I think it surprised him that he does find her appealing now, but he covers it up. She, of course, doesn't see the change. #WhenBubblesAintBright

Shuk:  Mood whiplash!  She sees the box and he admits he bought a mango cake for her.,  All is forgiven, and she's smiles and hunger.  He pulls the old "I was just in the neighborhood and remembered you like mango" routine. He has eidetic memory and remembers everything he hears.
JoAnne: I wonder if mango is an aphrodisiac and he's about to get lucky?
Shuk:  A happy girl is a willing girl...um, so I've heard. [shifty eyes]

Shuk:  She happily digs in, using the knife as an eating utensil. He doesn't like cake, so she dusts off and offers him a sweet potato. He's understandably grossed out, but she opens it and he grudgingly takes a bite.  And declares it not too bad.
JoAnne: I have heard that Korean sweet potatos are not like our sweet potatos - smaller, sweeter.  This makes sense because while I do like a sweet potato, I don't really think of them as a treat.

Shuk:  She loves her sweet potatoes wrapped in kimchi.  Her grandma loves...err loved, making them for her. She pounces back on the cake, and he asks her if she's really going to eat the entire thing.  I mean, most women don't eat like this in front of their men! She counters that it's okay, since she doesn't see him as a man anyway.
JoAnne: Buuuuuuuuuuurn
He might need one of these for his ego.
Shuk:  About that time she finally notices the blood on his hand, and begins to coo over the injury.  He's now all manly about it, but endures her blowing on it for a moment before pulling it away and gruffly telling her to wipe the cream off her lips.
JoAnne:  Little bit turned on, I'd say.  Him, not me.

Shuk:  He stares at her lips while she licks her fingers, then does some pouncing of his own.  His arm goes around her shoulders, there's a moment of awareness, and WHAM!  Kisseu! And what's sweeter than a cake kiss???
JoAnne:  YES more of this please

Shuk:  Kang-ju is finally on the bandwagon that being married to her might be an interesting challenge, irrespective of the chaebol to chaebol relationship of the families,  Yay!  It's going to be a nasty shock when he finds out about the curse.  Everybody is tiptoeing around him, but everyone is also talking about it in a home with paper-and-wood interior walls.  You might as well text him the info.
JoAnne:  Wouldn't you think the kids at school would have said something by now?  I had no idea he didn't know, really.

Shuk:  Doo-rim still confuses him, but that's okay because she's confused herself. After all, she's not allowed to like him, she's just there to prime the pump.  That will be a nasty shock for him too, poor boy.
JoAnne:  Priming the pump seems a bit graphic, under the circumstances.  I'm giggling.
Shuk:  Well, I did start the SqueeCap with a bang. Let's finish with an Archimedes Screw [Dokko Jin had a miniature one in his LVAD]

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