Birth of a Beauty - Episode 13 (A WookiCap)

*Cough, cough*. I ... this ... Let's just say there's a wonderful scene at the very end of this episode. And Joo Sang-wook looked so damn GOOD all the time my mouth waters. Anyway, skip to the end if you have a hard time wading through the WTF.
S@ki6: It even made me want to give up occasionally, but I powered through to the cute. 
JoAnne: I don't even pretend to watch it anymore. I saw what, 2 episodes at the beginning and then 2 back there a while ago. It's more fun this way, trust me.
Lafer: It is ten days before Christmas. My mind and calendar are a bit full of expected holiday cheer. That is why only snark comes out on here!
becca: I enjoyed this episode slightly more than usual because it had more Awesome Assistant, and he was sarcastic, which made me super happy.

Episode 13

Beau is waiting to propose in the restaurant, but his bride is currently dying in Kang-joon's hands! It's the peanut gallery. Er, allergy. He's just there by coincidence. Too bad for him she passes out before she can tell him whether Sa Geum-ran is still alive or not. I, too, am looking forward to seeing him in a straight-jacket. (He so needs one!) To his credit, he seems quite worried about the dying Sara
I read it as worried she would die before telling him what he wants.
He could just be worried about what to do with the body.
Tae-hee is getting mighty worried and ... can track her? Er, how and why?! (He put something on the car, but in a protective way,  not a creepy way.  In other words, it's not stalking because it's Our Hero doing it.) (I thought he gave her that little hand held tracking device.) (Yep. That's what happened.) Kang-joon, THE IDIOT, didn't take her to a hospital but to a hotel room. When she doesn't wake up, he asks himself whether this might really be a peanut allergy? And then, he goes through her purse to look at her ID. It says Kim Duk-soon. Next, he calls his Snake Wife. She's with Ji-hoon. She makes Kang-joon look like a really bad person ... oh. Wait.
Um, he is a really bad person?  And stupid, to boot.  With ridiculous ears. *laughs at Becca*
I do believe that one of the translations of this drama is: Cute and Sexy Idiots Who do Nothing for 20 Episodes.
I'm sorry, JoAnne! I can't hear you over the sound of how CUTE he is in this gif!!
Ji-hoon rushes to the hotel that his brother-in-law took his affair and runs right into ... Tae-hee! Who followed his tracker to the same location. Who recognizes this hotel room? I do! It's the one a very hot Kim Ji-hoon was in in Goddess of Marriage. Look!
JiHoon is remarkably ineffective as ChaeYeon's older brother.  Shouldn't he be confronting the inlaws with KangJoon's cheating or something?
Wouldn't you think? For the life of me, why were they in a hotel, Kakashi?  It's not like they ever had sex. I'm deliberately ignoring the miscarriage.
This room is reserved for only the scummiest of the scummy cheating husbands. (Sorry, kakashi)
(You got it wrong, KLnoona! HE didn't cheat. SHE did!)

Anyway, Tae-hee has a hot rage-fit while Fuck Ears just smirks all the time. I really want to smack him too! Smirk-ass thinks Sara is in love with him, not Tae-hee, which makes me laugh. He's delulu. Tae-hee just grabs Sara and carries her out of the room. End of delulu.
Funny how the DOCTOR doesn't say, "Hey, she's sick, possibly dying, let's get her to hospital." Or even do CPR.  Hippocratic oaths don't matter much in this world.  
I can't stop laughing at 'Fuck Ears' so I have nothing to contribute.
The whole cast is delulu on a constant basis.
I want Awesome Assistant. Where is Awesome Assistant? Gimme. Now.
Oh look! Sara isn't dead! She's alive - but looking almost dead. Tae-hee is angry with her. The fool actually believes that he "comes second" to Weird Ear, because Geum-ran loved those ears so much in her previous life. He even tells her he hates her more than Kang-joon. Where's the fastforward button??! She kicks him out, well done. How old is he? 10?
And is he blind?  She's so totally sick.
It does wonders for her hair, though.
I always love it when the characters leave out huge important pieces of information just so we get some angst. How about, I ate peanuts, I may be dying?????
Tae-hee's an idiot for not seeing how sick she is. Also for throwing a hissy-fit. Sara is an idiot for not TELLING HIM SHE'S POSSIBLY DYING. *looks around* Where's my popcorn?
Sara is too sick for words (or dead?) and Tae-hee complains the next day because there's no breakfast. It's his first day as Winner Group Food CEO. Wow, they just made up a company within the company? Love this. Have I missed something? When did he get that position? Oh, but look at you, man. You look SO FINE in your suit! But you're an idiot, go up and check how she is!
Hawt, yet stupid.
We'll just keep him for the weekends and find someone smart for real life.
This drama just likes to mess with our minds so much by skipping whole entire chunks of information.
See, this is EXACTLY how it would go in a five year-old's fantasy. I'm right. You know I am. End of the show, it will be revealed that they're all in kindergarten, and Awesome Assistant is actually their teacher, playing along good-naturedly. He's the only self-aware character. It makes sense.
At Winner Group, I get confused because Tae-hee talks to Awesome Assistant about a bankruptcy filing of Evil Han. I think I must have fallen asleep somewhere? So all of a sudden, Tae-hee has one month to save the company.
Unless they were only talking about Winner Food? No, it was the whole company.  Weird, because if it wasn't able to manage it's liabilities, it wouldn't be such a big deal.  Perhaps this is because of Grannie's alleged corruption.   Love how TaeHee talks to Evil Han.  So sassy!
This is the first time said bankruptcy has been mentioned.  At this point, I kind of expect his parents to turn up, too.
Maybe grandma was skimming the funds. It wouldn't surprise me. Just another detail left out.
Grandma is totally evil. I always said so. *munching leftover popcorn*
Tae-hee's office is ... well. On the 9th floor, but also rather full with leftover packaged food from Winner Food. Awesome Assistant briefs him about the company (in short: not going well), but he is thinking of his Ahjumma. How he hates her (why would he, seriously!) but misses her at the same time. He misses her so much he wants to go visit the dressing rooms. To "see celebrities", meaning Sara. This happens:
Okay, that was hilarious. 
I swore you said he was missing his Grandma and I was soooo confused.
Awesome Assistant, you are looking very good today. 
I like Awesome Assistant too.  Wonder if he'll get paired up with PD or something?

Sara's not there, of course, but Tae-hee happens to see last night's show on repeat. And he sees that she is eating peanuts. How can anyone draaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag nothing out over soon 30 minutes?! Anyway, he finally gets it.
The writers must be following a formula: Insert Angst Here. Go straight to Wasting Everyone's Time. Do not collect 200,000 Won.
Clearly the pages in the 'How to Write a Script for Television and Win Fame and Fortune' that they ordered out of the back of a comic book had it's pages in the wrong order.  Plus some were missing.
This is total crap. What else can I say.
Close your mouth, Tae-hee. Bugs might fly in.
He rushes home and finds her dead on the stairs.
Don't tease me!!
Not impossible: she is a sort of zombie.
I am thinking she's not merely dead or even really, most sincerely dead. And I don't buy that she collapsed in that pretty little sitting position, either.
Ji-hoon brings her back from the dead. We're lucky. 7 more episodes.
Ouch, I might be dead soon, if the writers keep wasting precious storyline like this.
You know what?  All the time that the idiots were around her not realizing what was happening, SHE KNEW.  So she's the idiot for not getting herself to the hospital.  He should just let her die.  Then the show could END.
Exactly!!!! Were her fingers broken? Could she not dial 119? Aaaaahggg! I want to tear my hair out!
Ji-hoon is plastic surgeon! Why would you call HIM, you big DOLT?
She's very weak because he got jealous (=didn't take her to the hospital) and has to rest for a few days. Since he's feeling very guilty, he drafts a temporary contract to switch their roles. Meaning: he's doing the cleaning and stuff. I'm sure I'd enjoy this whole sequence much more if he cleaned naked.
Or in a frilly French Maid outfit. 
Definitely naked. Actually, a pair of boxer briefs. Men naked only look good in certain situations. They look better with a little something on. Think of all the bending and stretching and dangling that goes on while cleaning.
Yes, I'm better with a little something left to the imagination. Except for a kiss. I don't need to imagine that, I want to actually SEE one that's not blocked at the last minute.
The competition is near and he has to go shopping for her. Much PPL follows. And a fight over a sweet squash. He wins against the Ahjumma and "Freude, schöner Götterfunke" plays in the background. (Everyone, youtube Rowan Atkinson singing that.) No, JoAnne, I'm not making this up!
Well you couldn't be, because Rowan Atkinson is real.
Seriously, Rowan Atkinson singing Freude, schöner Götterfunke is like the best thing after puppies before Name-Your-Kpop Bias.
I don't think I've ever seen anyone so excited about squash. And I say this having a family that gets pretty darn excited about vegetables.
It's filler time.
Maybe I should mention that Kang-joon gets confirmation through handwriting analysis and fingerprinting that Sa Geum-ran is still alive. What he wants to do with her? Kill her again. (Which Chaeyeon finds cool. Yeah...) Geum-ran's mother also finds out her daughter is still alive. Well, she knew it already, because she's a mother. Hence, she also finds out that Sara = Geum-ran. Have a picture of Joo Sang-wook:
'It is my esteemed opinion that this handwriting is RECENT. Therefore, your wife is not dead.'
Once again, no one questions how this could be possible even though the two women don't look REMOTELY SIMILAR!
That made me feel a lot better, thank you.
He looks tired.
He is probably feeling the same way about this storyline that we all are.
This is his serious face though

In preparation for the competition, Tae-hee cooks for Sara. While she sits on his back. Why not. I was most impressed how he cooks with just one hand! This is a very skillful man! I must have him.
But not for cooking, I suspect, and quite frankly, I want a man who uses both hands when ' not cooking.'
I am not as excited about the little cutesy sneak kiss on the cheek as I was in earlier episodes. I want these two to grow up.
Why is that every time these two get in the kitchen together, the episode comes to a screeching halt? So awkward.

It's competition time AGAIN! My, so many competitions ... It's very tough for Sara, of course, but Tae-hee brings her mother to see her. Which makes Sara change her recipe on the spot. Maybe she'll try something with peanuts? No, but she makes rice balls for her loved ones. Much use of hands = much love. Whatevs. It's a tie! Oh, we'll get more competition? I'm so spoilt. Where's my 2nd Lead?
Where's the awesome assistant?  I would like to spend some time reviewing his assets.
Yes, let's do that. He has nice assets.
Seriously? The judge did not even taste the rice balls! She just looked at them. Maybe she was afraid she'd explode from all the body heat poured into them.

Ah, here he is!!! His mother wants Sara as cooking instructor. The things mothers do for their sons ... Let's have a Joo Sang-wook gif!
Wait whose mother? Oh, Pasty Face Dough Boy. For a minute I thought you were telling me Tae Hee's parents DID come back.
Very cute!
When she couldn't use her legs and was on his back, he asked her what she most wanted to do when her legs worked again. She said: dance. So it's danceu-time soon! What she doesn't know but we do: he wants to propose to her during that dance. Let me swoon a bit first.
That would not have been my first wish.
She didn't even need working legs to do what I was hoping they'd do.
That dance better be a euphemism for something!
Those rice balls she made? Also the thing that will save Winner Group.  Frozen food, yuck. Anyway, SuperTeamLeaderExtraordinaireChoi will do all the work. Of course. He's the only competent person in this show, after all.  How convenient. Now ... I'm not sure I get this, but does Sara not know he is CEO of Winner Group Food? Cause she tells him about the selection of her rice balls as instant food as if he didn't know. Hm. Wait ... That's right, he never told her about that part of his life, right?! Only about that Grandma. And she has no clue what that Grandma does. By the way, that Grandma is told lies about Sara by Chae-yeon. Anyway, Tae-hee tells Sara he is the CEO that invited her to that gala event, but she just laughs at him. Why? She knows he's working there. How is this even unbelievable? Alright, Sara will be in for a surprise! Because she's still not too bright. 
Getting more dumb by the minute, actually.
*sneaks ground peanuts into her food*
It's getting hard to watch this through all the facepalming. Even Mr. Poppin' Fresh can't believe that Tae Hee has found a new fabulous product to save Winner Group Foods this quickly.
It's the Big (Rice) Balls Announcement Event! Almost as exciting as a competition. Tae-hee gives a wonderful speech (yes, I'm being very sarcastic) and then sees the lovely Sara in her red glitter dress. (I'm sorry, that dress is hideous. It looks like something you'd find in a plastic bad hanging on a wall in a Halloween store. And randomly putting on lip gloss is not going to help it.) Her eyes are big as UFOs. But now, it's time to dance the tango. No worries, even if you've never danced before, you do well with this man.
They heard us talking about her hair.
I guess if you can find a new product and pull off an extravagant launching party in less than 24 hours, you deserve the right to dance a spotlight tango at it.
I don't know where to begin to explain all the weird things about this scene. O__o
And then, the door opens ... and Evil Han struts in. Awwww. He'll have his black heart broken ... Eh, Winner some, Loser some. Tae-hee swirls Sara into a hug and says: "Marry me".


Hahahaaaa. Sorry, guys. I had fun with this one. The show is drunk and has severe dementia. The End.
It really is a lot of fun.  Keeps me wondering what's happening next.  Regarding the weak legs thing, that is totally possible after a severe allergic reaction for which you totally need a epinephrine shot, but instead get yelled at, and then dosed with saline.
Just tell me when the next episode is ready for commenting...
I have to say, this does prompt bursts of spontaneous laughter. But I think my facial expression is much like Sara's, when he was twirling her, through 90% of the drama.
I've decided that Awesome Assistant and I should be besties. We have the exact same expression when dealing with these people - an expression that says, "I can't believe you're actually that dumb. 
WTF am I watching?