Fanfiction: Mo Yuan and Shao Wan - Chapter 38.5 (Ten Miles of Peach Blossoms 三生三世十里桃花)
Chapter 38.5
written by Miniorchidconsulting by Juls
edited by kakashi
At nightfall, when everyone had retired to their
rooms and the only sound was the wind howling on the mountain, Yan Zhi felt
confident enough to leave the comfort of her chamber. Qiao Er was fast asleep;
the poor but happy child had exhausted herself under the care of Zi Lan’s
seniors while Yan Zhi had recuperated from her injuries. They had given Qiao Er
all the attention she had never known she could get, which meant that Yan Zhi
had been able to relax for the first time in what seemed forever. But this was
not a time to dwell on her own needs. She had a mission tonight.
Yan Zhi walked through the dark passages. The
moon was rising late tonight, it was pitch black outside - but immortals from
the Ghost tribe were comfortable in the darkness. Low light had always been an
advantage to her clan, especially during combat and spy missions, because they
could take opponents from other clans by surprise easily. Finding what she sought
would not be hard under these conditions. She only hoped her mission would be
completed swiftly without any further incidents.
She knew she shouldn’t return, but she had no
other choice. What happened today was a mistake, an unfortunate incident, an
embarrassment to both of them. Luckily, it was only Si Yin who had barged in.
She was sure Si Yin wouldn’t gossip to others about what she had witnessed. Yan
Zhi couldn’t have predicted that a moment of weakness would have such drastic
consequences. How could she face Zi Lan now? Would he want to pursue the matter
further?
With these thoughts in her head, she had to take
a deep breath before she could gather the courage to enter his room for the
second time today. Cautiously, she moved towards his bed within the dark, unlit
room. When Yan Zhi reached the bed, she was relieved that Zi Lan was sound
asleep. Now, the real mission was to find what she had left behind.
She searched the surroundings of his bed,
praying for luck to be on her side - alas, she was not that fortunate. If only
her powers were not suppressed on this mountain, she could have moved in and
out swiftly, or could have even conjured what she sought. Turning her attention
to his bed, she dreaded what she had to do next. Hovering over Zi Lan, she
tried to lift the edge of his blanket, carefully, slowly.
Without warning, his hand shot out and caught
her wrist. Zi Lan’s eyes were wide open, staring into hers.
“Yan Zhi,” he said.
This was not her day. She had made another
miscalculation. She should not have returned. If only she had never entered his
room earlier today, things would not have proceeded like they had. Could she
turn back time, so her humiliation would be over and her dignity was intact?
*******
Earlier that day…..
For several days, Yan Zhi had inquired about Zi
Lan’s condition from his seniors. They had told her he was recuperating well, and
there was no need to be concerned. But the memory of his collapse when they had
arrived at Kunlun still alarmed her. He had been severely injured because he
had taken blows that were meant for Qiao Er and herself.
She knew he had never left, the foolish man,
despite her wish to severe their ties. He had been hiding in the bamboo forest,
like a phantom, never straying too far in case more assassins would appear. He
was forever playing the hero, a hero she could no longer accept. He had
repeatedly made contact with Qiao Er, even bribed her for rice buns. Why he
craved her inedible rice buns so much she would never know. She had turned a
blind eye to their meetings, because it brought joy to Qiao Er. She had also
tried to improve the rice buns, but in vain.
Now that he was injured, Qiao Er asked about him
daily, but he needed to recuperate more, they were told. However, it had come
the time when Yan Zhi couldn’t wait any longer. She had to see Zi Lan in person
to assure herself his condition was stable. She had gone to his room when no one
was present and found him soundly asleep. She sat next to him and checked his
forehead, only to find that his skin was on fire and he was sweating profusely.
Wanting to comfort him, she went and got cold water but she could not find a
towel in the room. She didn’t want to ask his seniors, so instead, she dipped
her hands in the water, and soothed him with her touch, hoping that under her
care, his suffering would lessen.
His anguished face tugged at her heartstrings.
Zi Lan must be having a nightmare, she deduced. She caressed his face, and
without thinking, she brushed her lips against his, wishing the small chaste
kiss would take away his demons. She realized her mistake when Zi Lan captured
her in his arms and flipped her over, lying on top of her. She could feel that
his body was fiery hot when he buried his face into her neck. But then, his hot
breath ignited a fire within her she had thought lay dormant. Anxiously, she
pressed her hands against his chest, wanting to push him away, but she felt his
hot tongue tasting the nape of her neck, making her gasp.
Her will to stop him was further diminished when
he caught her earlobe between his teeth. Her body shuddered in response as his
mouth traveled down her neck, sucking and licking, leaving nothing untouched.
Pleasure shot through her, as her body was submerged in waves of unprecedented
desire. How long has it been since she had been held like this? As he felt her
through the layers of silk and caressed her body that had not been touched for
thousands of millennia, she could only surrender.
When he started to remove her clothes, Zi Lan
went slowly, as though he had all the time in the world, while her body shook
with anticipation for his touch, even when her mind told her to resist. Had he
taken her by force, she could have resisted, but his slow meticulous caressing
and teasing when he stripped her made her want him even more. She had pulled
his mouth onto her chest, and he knew what she wanted without words and had
complied by tasting her exposed skin, making her squirm with pleasure.
She heard him growl when he couldn’t remove her
xin yi, but it didn’t stop him from exploring her backside to find the
strappings soon after. With articulate skill and patience she never knew
existed, he slowly removed her strappings, never taking his eyes off her, as
though he needed her consent and confirmation. She could barely breathe when he
finally completed his task, but he didn’t remove her xin yi when it was within
his reach. Instead, he continued to tease, making her beg, when his hands
played with her body over her silk barrier.
She was aching and empty, so empty. She grew
moist, and that’s when he grabbed her bottom and pressed the ridge of his manhood
against her throbbing core. She cried out, and due to her ferocious need, she
clung to him, bit him and tasted him. She rocked her body against his and he
responded with desperation of his own. When she thought he would finally fill
her emptiness, he had pulled back and turned his attention to her breasts. She
could only whimper and shudder under his care, as he laid claim to them,
marking them, branding them as his own. His tongue and lips ravished her
thoroughly, as she begged him to be inside her because she could no longer
wait.
Her body trembled when Zi Lan released her
breasts and climbed over her. His eyes filled with tenderness and care as he
gazed into her eyes. He held her face in his palm as he brushed his thumb over
her quivering lips. He had yet to lay claim to them - they had never kissed
before, even once.
But before they could experience their first
times, Si Yin had interrupted them. It wasn’t the untimely intrusion that
brought the biggest humiliation upon her. No - the moment Si Yin called out, Zi
Lan’s eyes opened and she saw they were distressed and full of regrets; he did
not intend to embrace her after all. Reality struck her as she registered what
she had almost allowed to occur. Mortified, she pushed him off and ran as fast
as her feet could take her. She could never face him again after the intimacy
she had consented to, the intimacy he never desired. What would he think of her
now? How can a moment of weakness have such dire consequences?
******
Present time……
“Yan Zhi.”
“You’re awake!” She tried to pull back, but he
held on, his grip tight.
He sat up and grabbed her other wrist, holding
her hostage within his grasp. “Of course, I’ve waited for you.”
“Let me go!” she tried to pull away.
“Not until we talk,” he told her firmly.
“Release me or I will…,” with enough force, she
pulled her right wrist away, pulling him forward.
At the sound of his painful grunt, she stopped
pulling. “Zi Lan, are you alright?” she asked anxiously, touching his chest.
Zi Lan took the opportunity to grab her waist
and turn her around, pulling her down so that she sat in with her back against
his chest. Hugging her from behind, he held onto her waist and arm.
“If you struggle, you’ll hurt me,” he warned
her.
“You’re taking advantage of the situation,” she
accused him, angry now.
“I am,” he admitted without remorse.
Still struggling and outraged, she asked, “When
did you become a rogue?”
He held her even closer, his lips close to her
ears. “Just now. Being a hero no longer has its benefits. And I heard you don’t
like heroes,” he whispered, making her blush.
“You...” she turned her head, a mistake, because
their lips nearly touched. She quickly turned away.
She heard him sigh. “I just want to talk, Yan
Zhi. Stop struggling, unless you want to hurt me again. My head is still
bruised from earlier.”
Although she stopped struggling, she kept
silent. It was a mistake to have come here. She knew what he wanted to talk
about, but she was not ready. Not tonight, not like this, not when her mind
still could not comprehend what has transpired between them. She didn’t want to
hear his regrets or his apologies. Her pride was already damaged enough as it
is.
“Yan Zhi, I know what you’re looking for,” she
heard him say. “Once we talk, I’ll give it to you,” he bargained.
Even now, he had the upper hand. When had he
become this brazen? Why wouldn’t he let her have her dignity?
And he was too close, he made her unable to
think straight, with his body pressed against her own in the pitch darkness of
the room, engulfing her senses with his warmth. She closed her eyes in defeat.
It was best to get this over with, she concluded, no matter how uncomfortable
the conversation will be. “What do you want to talk about?” she asked him, even
though she dreaded what he was about to say.
“How is Qiao Er?”
Her eyes opened. What?
“Yan Zhi, how is Qiao Er?” he repeated, “I have
been recovering here for a few days now, how is she adjusting?”
“She’s doing well,” she told him.
“Is she still having nightmares?” he asked.
“How did you…?”
“I always knew.” Why was she surprised? Of
course he did, he had never left them. He knew all along Qiao Er had nightmares
ever since the day the assassins arrived in their lives.
Feeling more at ease with the current topic, her
body relaxed a little. “She didn’t have nightmares for two nights now, she’s
doing better. Your 10th and 7th seniors took her to see the waterfalls to cheer
her up. She loves the cranes here.”
“They did?” he laughed out loud.
Perplexed at his laughter, she asked, “Why are
you laughing?”
“Nothing. What else?”
“Your 4th senior is teaching her how to count,
she loves numbers.”
“4th would be a perfect Shifu for her, he is
excellent when it comes to calculations! I am not surprised that he took a
liking to Qiao Er. What else has Qiao Er done?”
Zi Lan continued to ask more about their daily
activities. So she told him how his seniors had surprised Qiao Er with treats
and tokens. Although she received many gifts from his seniors, it was 4th’s
gift that made Qiao Er most delighted. It was a small abacus that she now
carried around, making calculations of Kunlun’s inventory or whatever else
caught her fancy. One senior had brought over a change of clothes for them.
Though her own dress was dark blue, Qiao Er’s was pure white, matching the
disciples’ attire. She had become a white dove at Kunlun they said, so they
decided to call her “Little Dove”.
“She never had so much attention before,” Yan
Zhi said, her words almost choking her.
“It’s not every day we have a young beauty
reside here. My seniors love to dote on children, and Little Dove is a fitting
name for her.” She felt Zi Lan loosen his grip because she had relaxed against
him.
“She’s so happy now…,” Yan Zhi felt tears sting
her eyes, but she closed them and held back the emotions that were stirring
within her.
Zi Lan must have caught her tone, because he
held her closer again. “Yan Zhi…,” he whispered.
“No, let me go!” she told him with a slight
panic in her voice.
His head on her shoulders, he squeezed her
hands. “Yan Zhi, I won’t let you go again.”
She shook her head. “I don’t believe you.”
“Why?”
“Because everyone I cared for has left me,” she
blurted out, regretting her words as soon as they came out.
“I won’t.”
“You almost died.”
“I didn’t.”
“But you could have.”
“Yan Zhi...”
“Let’s not tempt fate,” she disentangled herself
from his arms and despite of his reluctance, he let her go. Standing before
him, she held out her hand. “We’re done talking.”
Zi Lan pulled out her red jasmine embroidered
xin yi from under the blanket. She quickly grabbed it from him, but his hand
held her wrist again.
His eyes bore into hers. “I won’t let fear of
fate decide our destiny. I will never let you go. No matter where you’ll be,
mortal or immortal realm….Yan Zhi, I will always find you.”
With those words, Zi Lan let go of her wrist;
allowing her to leave the darkness of his room, the warmth of his touch, the
comfort of his words. It was no longer the mortification of what had occurred
today that brought her discomfort, but the thoughts and words that had bared
her soul to him tonight.
How could she put distance between them when he
continued to capture her at her most vulnerable state? When would he realize
that his attempts to make amends were guided by his guilt and duty rather than
the desire of his heart? And when…..when would she learn to stop taking comfort
in his presence?