Fanfic: Mo Yuan and Shao Wan 2.0 - Chapter 64b (Ten Miles of Peach Blossoms 三生三世十里桃花)
Chapter 64b
written by Kakashiedited by LigayaCroft & Panda
Someone was screaming.
It was strange that it sounded like herself when she was so tired and wanted to go to sleep more than anything.
Pain rolled through her in massive waves, forcing her to press her body’s contents out, even when she had no strength left.
Sometimes, she tried to open her eyes, but she saw very little. It was dark all around her. She didn’t feel threatened by it, the darkness was waiting politely for her to finish before snatching her up.
There was a Golden presence guarding her, but it could not keep the darkness at bay. It’s ferocity was dimming the more her pain increased.
“It’s alright,” she told the Dragon. “It’s what it is, don’t worry, it’s not your fault.”
She thought she had a civil conversation with Mo Yuan about a mirror and a sword at one time, but that had to be a dream too. But... why was she holding these items in her hands? She was getting blisters from them, there was no sense in this. And yet, she continued clutching them as if they meant the world. One Demon and one Celestial in essence, worlds apart.
“Just a little more, just a little more!” her female advisor repeated over and over. “Demon Ancestor, don’t give up!”
Her head was filled with voices, excited but also frightened little voices. So many questions and no words to express them yet.
“Yes, really, you can come out,” she told her children over and over, “there is no danger here at the moment. Everybody is waiting for you.”
Even that Horse Woman had come!
“I refuse to be Nineteenth,” Shao Wan remembered to tell her with what she hoped was sufficient authority, though that was quite a feat when one was writhing in pain on the floor, “I should be at least Eighteenth.”
That girl performed some magic, a power that rumbled in the earth and echoed throughout the land for a long time. Like that Old Woman in her other dream, this one did not belong here. But the young one treaded lightly, managing not to disturb the forces here.
One woman came closer to unburden herself, telling her she had never wanted to oppose her, Shao Wan had always been whom she had wanted to become one day. Not feeling the need to punish the woman even though she had done her wrong, Shao Wan remembered a name but it didn’t fit.
“Yu Dian?”
No, this before her was a female - but she wasn’t whole. She was missing large parts of her soul. How had she lived like this? It had to be agony. The mirror showed Shao Wan where those pieces were. It also showed her she had in her possession some of her own missing pieces. Taken in an opportune moment? She had to give them back.
With the mirror, it was easy to call them forth and take them from her. Was it her task to tell the woman that she should merge with her other half to become one again?
Not sure she would understand, Shao Wan told the Tired One instead because it seemed important.
“This woman by your side,” Shao Wan said, “she is only half a soul. You have to put her back into the body she came from. Can you do that?”
The Tired One said she had once been able to, but her powers had been taken from her. The way she looked at the mirror, did she think her powers were in there? Shao Wan wanted to tell her that was not so, a mirror contained nothing. It was only a door.
There was blood offered to Shao Wan, warm and sticky. Dragon Blood! But she couldn’t keep it down. What a waste.
It was the key, but where was the door?
“Push, Demon Ancestor, push!”
The Mirror also showed her other things. Many she didn’t understand because just like her children, she had no words to describe what she felt and saw.
“I see it, Mo Yuan!” Shao Wan shouted at one stage, “I see it! The thread you wove! If I could just…”
But when she wanted to grab it, it disappeared again into the incredible vastness.
She saw something else. There was a wound in the earth, bleeding power. Like a body giving birth, it bled and bled.
“Can we close it?” Shao Wan asked the Half-Soul and then the Tired One. “It is un-balance.”
They’re thinking I’m mad, Shao Wan realized as she spoke, but she wasn’t. Not yet.
Gonggong, that idiot, Shao Wan thought, why did he bang his head against Mount Buzhou? Well, he was angry, but... did he have to do that?
“Mo Yuan, do you know where the four pillars of the sky are?”
“Don’t worry about such things now, my Love.” She heard how much he tried to sound calm and composed when he was the pure opposite. She had always wanted to ruffle his feathers and now that he was more agitated than ever, she only wanted to hold him and tell him it was going to be alright.
“Your father hid three of them, but who guards them?”
The lay of the land blossomed in front of her eyes like a mirage. Kunlun. It isn’t in the center. It is one of four equals. Its counterbalance is here in the Demon Realm. Fuxi didn’t want me with the Master of Kulun because together, we command half of four.
“A calamity is coming!” she suddenly cried, “they’re not gone! They’re waiting to come back! The Old Ones! So vengeful…”
She could see them. Lurking. Waiting. The destruction would be horrifying.
“Shhh, shhhh, my love,” the Dragon said and put his lips to her forehead, so soft and comforting, “you must not think of such things.”
Why did he not listen? Why did he never listen?
“Mo Yuan,” she urged him, “your mother managed to mend the sky, but she had no strength left to patch up the earth. We need to close it to restore Balance. Mo Yuan? Mo Yuan!”
“I’m here,” he said, but why was he so distant? She tried to hold on to him, but with those objects in her hand, she couldn’t. He drifted away, a Golden, shrinking presence in the vast, vast nothingness.
“Oh no,” she whimpered, suddenly realizing why he had made her summon his sword. “Please… no!”
“Almost there, my Love,” he whispered by her ear, “please stay with me, Shao Wan, please. I cannot live without you. Please.”
Is that so? she thought in wonderment. But she felt it was true. Once such a joining had happened, a separation meant inevitable death.
“I see it, I see it, Mo Yuan!” she told him excited, the soul thread was back, glimmering blue. “Look!”
He looked.
“I will try to catch it,” his calm voice said, “guide me.”
But could a hand so small find a threat with no substance in the eternal void?
“It’s getting away!” she feared. Oh no.
“Guide me.”
“This way, can you feel it?”
“Here?”
“Yes, yes! Oh, you almost have it… almo…”
Gone.
But he was not one to give up, had never been. “Guide me.”
“I can’t see it anymore! It’s useless.”
“It’s there. I can feel it. Wait…”
You would do all this for me? Shao Wan thought, tears welling up in her eyes.
“Wait… is it this one?”
“You caught it? You really caught it?”
Mo Yuan was so proud she just had to smile, but he was also barely managing to hold onto it, his hands were shaking too much.
“I’ll pull it out, Shao Wan,” he told her. “Wait a little longer, just a little longer. All will be well.”
That was probably a lie, but she did not blame him for saying it. Sometimes all that was left was lies to believe in.
Between waves of pain, Shao Wan felt the song of her soul fill her head. She wanted to transform to dance to it in the sky, but that was just silly. Her body was heavy, heavy like a mountain, she could not move at all.
And then, Mo Yuan ate them all, all the pieces.
Why…?
“No,” she cried, “why did you do that? I hate you! I hate you!”
“Press, Demon Ancestor!” The Fox shouted at her, “press, dammit!”
So tired.
So tired!
The darkness was closing in.
Did she regret it?
So much.
“My children,” she wept, “I am so sorry I cannot meet you.”
“But you can,” Mo Yuan said, “Shao Wan, you can. They’re coming. I can see them. They’re coming!”
They were?
Shao Wan screamed from the top of her lungs. Only a little more. Only a little more. More pain than ever, was she being ripped apart?
It ceased. There was a sound.
A whimpering, tiny sound. The world held its breath as her daughter filled her lungs with air.
And then, the baby’s voice made the Universe shudder.
“She’s here,” Shao Wan sobbed. It is real, isn’t it? It’s not a dream?
“Push!” Bai Qian shouted at her. “Push!”
Not done. Not yet done. She had to bring her son into the world too. Only a little more. Only a little more.
The darkness smiled, its menace no longer hidden, holding out its hand to her. Shao Wan wasn’t going to take it yet. But afterwards, she would have to. She had no strength left to fend it off.
***
“Here, hold them again,” a bloodied but smiling Bai Qian said, “congratulations, Shifu. They are beautiful.”
Two tiny creatures were positioned back into his arms very carefully. Warm, fragile, alive. Somebody had cleaned them while he remained kneeling frozen before Shao Wan. He had absolutely no strength left inside of him when he hadn’t even been the one to do the real work.
Looking down at the reddened, scrunched up faces, the tiny fists, the fingers and toes, the bellies, legs and arms, the traces of black hair on the little heads, the chests that rose and fell in unison, Mo Yuan felt his heart overflow like a flash flood.
“I…,” he stammered, “thank you.”
Tears began pooling in Mo Yuan’s eyes, obstructing his view. Quickly, he blinked them away. He wanted to see everything, every little detail. Words? He had none when there was so much to say.
“I do not deserve your thanks. Zhe Yan won’t like to hear that you’re that good at his job,” Bai Qian smiled.
Good? He exhaled in disbelief.
“I almost fainted, Seventeenth,” Mo Yuan admitted to his shame.
“Me too,” the Crown Princess said, “how did you even know how to cut an umbilical cord? Shifu, you are full of surprises.”
Mo Yuan knew he deserved no such praise. Everyone in here had helped, no matter what tribe they were from. In the face of such a wonder, who dared think of the strife between them? Even Tian Gu simply sat next to her mother, preparing something from clean cloth to dress the babies in.
Mo Yuan looked down at his son on his left and his daughter on the right. They were beautiful, weren’t they? He couldn’t imagine there had ever been anything more beautiful.
“Shao Wan,” he said, letting his voice quiver all it wanted, “Shao Wan, did you see their lashes?”
“I don’t think I saw their lashes,” she answered weakly.
“Here!” Mo Yuan said and moved up to her side. “Look!”
Holding them up for her to see, he felt a huge smile pull his lips upwards and happiness flood his heart. They had made it. She had made it. Shao Wan had delivered his children. She looked so pale, so frail, it had cost her so, so much… he hadn’t even known he could love her more. But he did. So much it hurt.
He was going to cry again, wasn’t he.
“God of War,” Fong Hung cleared his throat. “Would you mind… if I could move...”
Oh. Quickly, Mo Yuan moved to take Fong Hung’s place. The Mount hadn’t been able to move for hours and from the expression on his face, it was clear that he was in great pain. Mo Yuan held the children to Shao Wan’s chest so that they could feel their mother.
“Mei Lin and Mei Shiu,'' she said dreamily. “To the beauty they represent.”
“I like their names,” he said.
“Mo Yuan, can we go there? This place in the mortal world. I would like to see it again.”
“Of course, Shao Wan. Of course. I will take you there as soon as you’re strong enough.”
“Now. It has to be now,” she said.
“Shao Wan…?”
She turned her head a little to look at him.
“I can’t stay here,” she said and a sob escaped her throat. “Mo Yuan, you always knew it couldn’t be stopped.”
“No, Shao Wan. That’s not true!”
How fast delirious happiness could turn into bone deep dread.
“Get everybody away from me,” Shao Wan said tearfully. “Especially… especially my babies. When the Madness takes me, kill me. I don’t want to live like this. A danger to everybody I once loved. An Abomination to the world.”
“No,” Mo Yuan managed to make his voice firm and commanding when he wanted to wail and shout. He had hoped… had hoped the problem had somehow taken care of itself. Should she not be rewarded by the Universe for bringing two perfect, immortal babies into the world? And if not that… he had hoped they would have more time together, time like this, to sit and look at their children, to laugh at how they pressed their eyes shut as if that would keep out the world, to wonder about the grip of their fingers, the sucking power of their tongues and mouths.
“Use Xuan Yuan again,” she said, her voice gaining strength. “Only this time, use it to destroy my soul for good. I know that’s why you had me summon it.”
“No,” Mo Yuan said again. He pulled Shao Wan a little closer and buried his face into her hair. “Silly woman. Do you really think it’s all on you again?”
Her breathing was labored and her eyes were drooping. What a brave woman she was. She had given all she had and more - and yet was still ready to continue giving.
“Please, Mo Yuan,” she whispered. “You owe me this. I do not want the world to remember me in the form of Crazed One. Please, I…”
She tried to move, but Mo Yuan held her more closely.
“... there is no time left,” she urged him, struggling against his grip. “Please. Please!”
“Have you never wondered why Qing Quan didn’t succumb to this madness himself? He, who has pushed the limits of magic like no other Demon before him?”
She said nothing, but she began to tremble in his arm, fear making her eyes grow large. Was she even listening?
“I am no Demon,” Mo Yuan continued nonetheless, he wanted her to understand, to stop being afraid, “but I spent some time trying to understand your tribe and its magic. Your power comes from the liquid fire that flows underneath the ground whereas ours comes from the sky. Celestials turn ‘demonic’ when they overuse or misuse their powers. Only, it has nothing to do with you Demons. It’s only a word some scholars picked to make it sound particularly dangerous. Celestials that turn demonic are cut off from Sky power, their cultivation dissipates, they become mere shells of what they once were. It’s the opposite for you Demons. If you overuse or misuse your powers, you become consumed by it. You become raging Beasts that want to destroy everything around them by sucking in more and more power. Until the entire Creation is gone.”
Shao Wan had her eyes closed, but she seemed to listen to him at least.
“Why would the Soulswappers be able to transfer cultivation and souls without once being punished for it? Only some of them are from the Demon Tribe, you might say, but even the ones who are like Yu Fen… they did not turn mad, even when they helped you to transfer the souls of our children into the flask.”
“But I feel it, Mo Yuan,” Shao Wan said, “it’s only steps away, like a huge, black vortex. I will lose myself, how can I not? I have no strength left inside of me to fight it any longer.”
“No, my Love,” Mo Yuan said. “I will not let this happen. I did not have you summon Xuan Yuan so I could stab and kill you. I did not let you hold the sword for so long to just take it away from you. No… it’s you who has to use it. On me.”
***
Shao Wan had heard him. It’s you who has to use it. On me. Only… those words made no sense to her. What did he mean? Had she misunderstood? She wanted to let him repeat the words, but Mei Lin moved a little and opened her eyes ever so briefly, chasing every thought right out of Shao Wan’s head.
“Your Father often speaks words nobody understands, he likes to confuse people and walk away laughing in secret,” Shao Wan whispered to her beautiful daughter, “it best to get used to it early.”
“They do it by diverting power away from them, Shao Wan,” Mo Yuan finished his lengthy explanation, sounding very smug about all of his knowledge. “Qing Quan managed to capture it in his devices,” he indicated the humming boxes all around them in the chamber. “The Soulswappers feed it back to the earth. The rift. ‘A place where the earth bleeds power’, remember? It doesn’t only bleed out though. It can also take in.”
The rift… she had seen it only recently, Shao Wan thought. But they were far away from it here. How should she be able to channel anything into it? She wasn’t Qing Quan either. Carefully, she eyed the darkness that had concentrated itself into a black hole. That was all too familiar. It had threatened her before. Only now, it was bigger.
Tian Gu stood up and came over, holding in her hands little clothes fashioned from her mother’s robes.
“They’re so cute!” she squealed when she got a closer look at the sleeping babies. “Shifu, look. My mother made those to keep them warm. Oh, and hats, too. She said she remembered that putting something on my head was always the most important thing.”
“Please thank her,” Mo Yuan said, carefully beginning to put the sleeping gowns on the children. Their tiny arms! Shao Wan could not believe that something so little would ever grow into a real human? “Eighteenth, she has nothing to fear from me if she remains reasonable and does penance for her crimes.”
“Shifu, Wuwu refused to come. How angry are you with my Tribe? Is it bad?”
“You must leave,” Shao Wan said, turning her head to look at the Princess. “Mo Yuan might forgive you, but his Father most certainly will not.”
Tian Gu frowned and looked at Mo Yuan, she looked very worried. She was probably thinking her mad already once again.
“Demon Ancestor,” Tian Gu whispered, “is my Shifu’s father… coming back from the dead?”
“I hope not,” Shao Wan said with a shudder, “but he doesn’t need to for his Creation to purge itself of things that don’t belong here. You must leave or a great calamity will come. I talked to your Wuwu, she told me those things.”
“You talked to…,” Tian Gu’s eyes grew a fraction larger. “Who must leave?”
“Your entire tribe,” Shao Wan said. “Isn’t it obvious? Go talk to your Elders if you don’t believe me. All they have been trying to do since you got here by accident is have you return home.”
“But I… I don’t want to…”
“Eighteenth,” Mo Yuan said. “I’m sure your mother knows too. She only got confused because of the Tower Engineer who exploited her powers for his own plans.”
His blood - the key to opening the door to where the Horse Tribe had come from by accident. Another Creation. His Mother’s creation. Of course, Mo Yuan had figured it all out too. It’s what he did.
“But how… how…,” Tian Gu’s eyes were now round as the moon, “who can…”
“Tian Gu,” Ling Dao’s voice was heard. “Come here, child. We must talk.”
“She can do it,” Shao Wan informed Mo Yuan. “She has enough powers, that girl. Then I’ll be Eighteenth.”
“Shao Wan,” Mo Yuan chuckled, “you’re aware of the fact that you’re my wife, I hope? If you are anything, you are my disciples Shimu, way above in rank to all of them.”
“Oh, we better tell them that then,” Shao Wan murmured, “or they might ask me to serve them at the table!”
Bai Qian came down the stairs, looking clean and refreshed. “I sent for Zhe Yan,” she informed them, “my messenger will tell him to wait at Kunlun.”
Damn that bird! Never there when she needed him the most.
“We’re leaving, Shao Wan,” Mo Yuan said.
“Where… where are we going?” she gasped.
“Kunlun.”
“But I…”
“... I will cure you of this madness once and for all there,” Mo Yuan said. “I promise. And just in case it overcomes you on the way…”
He gestured towards something that stood in the corner.
“That’s… a cage,” Shao Wan observed. “Oh. It’s one of those cages.”
Fashioned to hold Abominations, Crazed Ones.
“But my children will think you like to put their mother into a cage!” she exclaimed.
“I doubt they will be awake long enough to notice,” he smiled.
“Be careful!” Shao Wan squealed, “you cloud jump like a madman!”
“Excuse me?”
“Recklessly and much too fast,” she continued in all seriousness, “often almost missing the next cloud.”
“I have never missed a cloud!”
“Of course you have!” she bristled. “That time… when… I…”
Dammit, she couldn’t remember.
Mo Yuan chuckled again. “I will go slowly, don’t worry. And I will wait for you at Kunlun. You must not let go of Mirror and Sword, do you hear me? Not once.”
Shao Wan looked down at her hands. “I gave birth holding these things,” she said drily. “Do you think riding in a wagon with them is harder?”
“Take care, my love,” Mo Yuan said impulsively. “I am leaving. Please hurry.”
There was a feeling like something was ripped out of her chest when he disappeared up the stairs with her babies. But she would not cry. And maybe she couldn’t. She felt so empty.
He hadn’t really eaten fragments of her soul, had he? She had dreamt it in her delirious state earlier. He hadn’t said It’s you who has to use it. On me either, had he? That was a thing she frequently dreamt about in her nightmares, wasn’t it?
Her. Stabbing him. Right through the heart. With a sword.
Chapter 65