Ten Miles of Peach Blossoms 三生三世十里桃花 - Episode 33 (Recap)

kakashi: It took forever to recap this episode because Mark in the mortal realm looks SO GOOD. The sexual tension is intense. They really shouldn't hold back like this, I'm sure it's unhealthy.
JoAnne: I know it's unhealthy for us, anyway. 

Episode 33

Bai Qian has fallen asleep in that tea house (all that "Go" playing! So exhausting!) but when the audience claps and cheers after the end of the story, she wakes up with a start. Of course, A-Li is missing. When is he ever not. 
I mean, they had rope back then, right? Tie that kid down. Or, I don't know, stay the fuck awake when you're watching him?
Luckily, she has a surveillance copper mirror (they come with different functionalities, it seems! This is an upgraded version for sure) and finds him in ... a brothel. Oh my.
His father's son. One track mind.
I think this is Chen Yu's influence.
She asks for directions (haha at the guy who vents about the "proper-looking gentleman" who turns out to be such a "lecherous" devil) and gets the little one out (he's closely watching two people getting busy in bed)
So they can come up with a piece of copper that will show you where someone is, no matter where that is - but it won't tell you where 'is' is? Come on. If you're going to do a job, do it right.
Turns out A-Li witnessed some sexual harassment on the street and was then told the harassed woman and the "fat man" went into a "flower building" (=a brothel). He wanted to save the woman and followed after. He is quite disappointed he did not see any flowers in that house and neither did he find the fat man. Awwwwww, you cutie. This is so random, but maybe it's to show how much they're bonding, because Bai Qian makes him swear he won't tell his father about it. Yeah, good call, I get the impression Crown Prince wouldn't particularly like his son wandering about brothels.
Like that makes him unusual among parents.
The candle flickers and goes out and the Crown Prince immediately gets up to leave. On his way out, he tells Die Feng he'll be back by the time he finishes his cup of tea to discuss more details. Ha, this different time-speed can be really convenient. Later, he sends Die Feng to investigate further who was attacked and who wasn't.
And he couldn't come up with this time-management gem during Su Su's life time?
When Su Jin gets to his part of the palace to see him, she is informed he has left again. To be with Bai Qian in the mortal realm. Heheheheheheeeee. She's happy when she hears he will attend his grandfather's feast later though. Yes, she's planning something, the snake!
No, the snake married the FIRST fiance.
No, she's the Snake (capital S). Su Jin is just the snake (small s).
It seems to be the night of sexual harassment, because next, Bai Qian is approached by a drunk, lusty man, who is trying to touch "this fine young man". Okay, not a good idea. Ye Hua is very protective of his Qian Qian.
Mmm, it's sexy. Not the lusty drunk. Ye Hua.
A-Li says: "You are a man of talent to have managed to annoy my father" (true, we don't see him angry often) (Just around Su Jin) and when the drunkard threatens them after this, Ye Hua simply poofs him away. Destination unknown. Haha.
Bai Qian, with a smile, says she could have handled it herself. She thinks it was no biggie, the man only touched her "once or twice". RAWR. Crown Prince takes this as an invitation to grab her .... and when people stare, he freezes the world. Are you allowed to do that, Prince? I'm sure there's a rule.
I like the way he pulls her into his body, speaking of RAWR. I never in a million years thought I would be so attracted to a guy in a robe and a manbun.
Like he cares.
Yeah, I don't think either of them care. I know I don't care. Do you care? Didn't think so.
He kisses her then and says "You were merely kissed once or twice" - and then lets time run again. Haha and *swooooon*. She cannot take offense now, can she.
Oh my lord, it's a good thing I'm sitting down because I don't think my knees are working.
He takes her hand again too as they walk on (looking smug and pleased) ...
If he looks this proud of himself after two little kisses imagine later...no, AFTER that.  
... and they end up in the only vacant room in town. Bai Qian turns quite shy. That's completely unnecessary, of course. A-Li is there, too, after all. DAMN, look at him.
That's a man who's mentally working out his...mmm...choreography.
He stays up reading (okay, I might have to stop taking screenshots of each and every scene or I'll never finish, but he is SO BEAUTIFUL)...
Don't stop on my account. 
... and then walks over to the bed, to gaze at his little family. He thinks that he failed to anticipate that Bai Qian would truly sever all ties to him (she means what she says though, dude. Pay attention). He hopes that she will remember their past eventually - and at the same time hopes she never will. Ouf. Yeah ... drama, you do a good job at telling us not to be too giddy and happy, cause this ain't over till it's over.
And sometimes even when it's over it's not over. But then again, sometimes it's over before it ends. And then other times, it never even starts although it looks like it's chugging along.
There are assassins outside! Yes, it's those demonic puppet killers and bodyguard Tian Shu is having a hard time fighting them. When Ye Hua appears, they scatter. This is a strange matter ...
It seems pretty random.
The next morning, Ye Hua looks as bright and good as ever, even though he couldn't have gotten much sleep. After incredibly cute A-Li chatter, he excuses himself - he really needs to go to that Heavenly Lord birthday feast. Bai Qian takes Riceball to the Fox Den in the meantime... and continues to feed him fruit only before putting him to bed. She is very, very fond of the little Riceball. 
Then she should stop giving him a diet that will end up with him shitting his brains out.
Su Jin gets words Ye Hua is back (ugh, she really has nothing to do, this witch - can't she at least sew?), back without the Fox Queen. Su Jin is happy about that, now she has "absolute confidence in keeping Ye Hua here". And here comes her crazy-ass plan. She will pretend that Ex-2nd Prince's son Yuan Zhen molested her. That, thinks Su Jin, is a serious enough matter for Ye Hua having to stay at the Celestial Palace for a few days. Let this sink in. She'd destroy someone's life just to keep Ye Hua in the Palace for a few days.
It can't possibly work. By now everyone must know that any man who touched her would fall dead from poison instantly, or at least have his manhood fall off. It'd be like dipping it in battery acid.
Su Jin goes and lures the poor boy into Xiwu Palace. Once inside, she puts a sleeping spell on him, pours alcohol down his throat and then makes her maid go out and cry for help, her mistress wants to hang herself out of distress! If only. She sobs and sobs in front of the Heavenly Lord shortly after. I think we need to call Trotwood and get her to bring her slap-suit.
I hope she has extra suits. They better be one-size-fits-all, probably. Maybe some of them are texturized or something. I'm gonna wanna leave marks. Deep, scarring marks.
Ye Hua and his two uncles are alerted and come in as well. Su Jin sobs and sobs how she "almost lost her innocence" to this young drunk beast. Haha, nice of you to advertise that Ye Hua has not touched you, you witch. Beautiful side-eye there, too. Still, she begs to be granted death, and the Heavenly Lord is major pissed off, but not at her.
Please, please, please, grant her wish. Oh please.
He punishes the young man harshly, even though nothing at all happened to Su Jin - just for being the son of his 2nd son, the one he once favored the most. Yuan Zhen is bound with an Immortal Seal and sent to the mortal real to suffer trials for 60 years. All his father's pleading falls on deaf ears. But Ye Hua is ANGRY.
He's thinking, 'I missed kisses for this BULLSHIT?'
Su Jin has gravely miscalculated and we all laugh at her. Back in Xiwu Palace, she still pleads with Ye Hua to "grant her death" to prove her innocence (oh come on now) and he sees himself forced to exchange a few words with her. He lets her know he has seen through that little act of her and that he knows she framed Su Su just like this. The reasons why he has let her live? First, because of the Soul-gathering Lamp. And second, because she is taking care of Su Su's eyes in her eye sockets. BRUUUUTAL, I love it.
Holy Freezing Godballs, I had to put on a sweater that was so cold.
On second thought, he would find someone else to take care of those eyes if she died. She means nothing to him. Nothing at all.
You're an ant, Su Jin. You're a half a grain of rice that someohne dropped out of their mouth on to the dirty floor. Something a starving man wouldn't bother to pick up. You mean nothing, and you never, ever did. I think 90% of the reason I love Ye Hua is for how he shuts this schemer down. The other 10% is his hair. Okay 80% for shutting down schemers, 10% hair, 10% voice. Nope. Final breakdown: 60% shutting down Miss Hateful, 10% each for hair, voice, face, and persistant, focused lustiness.
Ye Hua bumps into Uncle Three outside and they vent together - Heavenly Lord used this opportunity to further suppress his 2nd son. He is so petty, the old asshole, and he can't stand how happy his 2nd son is! The lesson? Do not show your affections, ever. You know, I think Uncle Three is the smartest of them all - wanna bet he is living by this dictum?
Oh, you think this is why he's not with ChengYu? Could be. I assumed he was a commitment phobe right up until about 2 seconds after he lost her, and then pride wouldn't allow him to chase. But that doesn't make sense if you give it a thought, because they don't exactly expect men to be faithful.
Speaking of ... Uncle Three is curious to find out why Ye Hua is not pushing ahead with the wedding to his Su Su? A sadness comes over Ye Hua ... his love has forgotten completely about him. Ah, the amnesia potion! Uncle Three knows. Probably because she remembered he took her eyes out. What are Ye Hua's plans? He says he wants to start all over again. She does not have good memories of the Celestial Palace, so let them be forgotten. "I just have to take things slowly and find my way into her heart". Good luck, buddy.
A+ for good intentions, though.
Fengjiu still has no luck with sexy-times - and it's been two years. Oh, but there he is, our Dijun turned Emperor! Has he grown tired of his other 999 wives? No, he has come to talk about his one true love, the Noble Consort, who has left the palace to become a nun after giving birth to the Crown Prince Yuan Zhen. Hold it. Waaaait a second. Ohhhhh!
We're going to get epically twisted aren't we?
We learn that Yuan Zhen is back at his father's palace though, together with a Taoist nun. The Noble Consort only comes twice a month, to visit her son. But not her husband. How sad. Yes, that's the bitterness of life, designed by Si Ming. He touches her forehead then and says the flower is very beautiful. And it feels familiar to him. Do you think he's watching dramas on Dramafever? It does look like their logo a lot, doesn't it.
Excellent headdress, Fengjiu. Sorry that the mortal version of DiJun is not as attractive as white-haired DiJun.
He is very fascinated by it and feared falling under her spell. He is lusty too, but Fengjiu isn't. Or she is, but she isn't ready to give herself to him. Good. It seems it's not Fengjiu acting like this though - but Lady Chen's body! (I guess the two times she had sex with the Emperor weren't all that good then?) Anyway, Fengjiu has a solution: Two Lives Curse!
Fengjiu's solutions make me nervous by now.
We end the episode in the Fox Den - A-Li is munching loquats, but is craving other things. He wants to eat steamed mushrooms and cabbage and radish soups! Where is his daddy! Daddy is BACK. And he scolds Bai Qian right away for not feeding their son properly - he is growing! She says: "I know, that's why I've been hoping day and night for your return". Oh my, Bai Qian.  
Yeah, blame the kid, sure.


This was a busy episode, but what stood out was Ye Hua's various emotions. He has accepted that Su Su / Qian Qian chose to forget him and Uncle Three says out aloud what Ye Hua secretly fears: that it is because he did wrong, so damn wrong. It leaves him with a great double fear: that she could remember this (which would jeopardize everything) but also that Qian Qian might not love him like Su Su did. That he has had his chance and that was it. 
Every time I think that seems too cruel, I remind myself that at least he has eyes.

This insecurity leaves him desperate for any show of affection from her. Any sign he laps up with so much hope and pleasure. But Qian Qian is not ready to even think about feelings towards this man whom she has "just met" and who takes so many liberties with her. Of course she's attracted. She may tell herself it's because she wanted him to cook, but she has clearly anticipated his return because her presence means something to her. I think Bai Qian is lonely. Mi Gu is cute, but he is not her equal in intellect. For the first time since Kunlun, there is a man in her life who can challenge her. And different from back then, this man treats her like a woman. A woman he fancies. 
You know what? You fancy something sweet around 4pm. This is a starving man eyeing his first meal in days.

I am not sure what has to change for her to question her own feelings - but I fear it's something drastic. Bai Qian strikes me as someone who is afraid of losing control and definitely afraid of opening herself up to people too much. She is very secretive and has always been, not least because she has a High God hidden away in a cave somewhere. But she also acts like a person who has lost things very dear to her - her Shifu for one, and second, her biggest love. Yes, she has taken the amnesia potion and yes, she has forgotten. But I think part of her remembers.
The heart wants what it wants.