블러드 Blood - Episode 2 (A FakeCap)

Here we go again. Episode 1 took me far too much time to recap, even raw and I cried and cried all night over the lost time I put into that because y'all know what I would much rather recap. Still, at least there is Ku Hye-sun now. Let the bloodfest begin. Also, the same disclaimer applies: watching and recapping raw, but getting it (almost) all right. I think.
JoAnne: And I will try not to use all my best reactions during the live tweet but people, seriously, the horror is real... I may not be able to hold it in.
Shuk: [sigh] The things we do for you, our faithful squeeglets. 

Episode 2

We're back at war and back at strutting, at throwing phones and bad CGI. Maybe I haven't valued the phone-throwing enough the first time round? It's really that gesture that makes us realize: this is one badass mofo pampire.
You know what he's a twig and back in 1994 those phones were HEAVY. Give the child some credit.
Not any heavier than his ham-handed acting. And David Lee Roth was much better at it.
Seoul at night and then by day, and it's 2015 now. I wonder who that girl in the taxi is, but I'll be damned! It's Park Ji-Sang. I was fooled by the lips.
Plus he's wearing Jackie Onassis' favorite pair of sunglasses.
His face looks that that standard alien head with the big eyes and pointy chin. And facial expression.
He is here to talk to his dongsaeng Joo Hyun-Woo who finds graves. Oh wait ... it's THAT grave he already undug in episode 1. Wait, is undug not a word? Damn. Anyway, cool, he is a time traveling pampire, I guess? Straight from there to the here and now? There's a lot of the pampire virus in that grave, which means ... the one buried there is a pampire too.
So this part is confusing, because based on the conversation you didn't hear, that picture of a grave? The one that looks like the one he dug up? That is that grave, but dug up 20 years earlier. They're spending so much on that classy CGI that they just re-used the photo.We're so enthralled by his vampire charms we won't notice, right? Lemme guess:  that grave is actually ground zero for his parents. Although none of the adults appeared to have been archaeologists, but whatever. Minor detail.
I didn't pay attention; I was too busy removing your extra spaces in between the sentences in the above paragraph (thank you, says the double-spaces police).
At the hospital, with sacral background music, Doctor Lee Jae-Wook is looking swell.
What a handsome bastard he is, yes.  Shall we just refer to him as Handsome Bastard?
When I see the word "sacral", I think "butt". [giggle] He has the best hair so far, for sure.
And then, THERE SHE IS!!!!! Ku Hye-sun as Yoo Ri-Ta, a badass doctor. Probably a genius, too. And there is Jo Jae-yoon from Liar Games, too! As Doctor.
He's already Doctor PissyPants to me.
She already annoys me. You are a physician in a hospital, someone barges frantically into your office, and the first thing you do is bark at him? How about thinking maybe there's a critical patient in need of your (no doubt dubious) skills, there, chica? He even uses the word "Urgent" but she doesn't care and goes back to flipping pages. Pfui! Learn tatting. you might be better at it than this.
Damn, her acting is bad even when she just flicks pages
They're discussing the new guy, this genius doctor called Park Ji-sang. Dude. Your sunglasses. No. He has just entered the hospital (have I recently mentioned how cool he is?!) when Yoo Ri-ta zips passed him. The sunglasses fall and break. Poor quality, I see. He is annoyed, she is "dude, no time" and runs away. She's got an important meeting to attend!!!
I loathe her on sight. And since she only puzzled me in BoF and I vaguely liked her in Angel Eyes, for the moment I'm going to pretend that what I loathe is her character, and not her incredibly inappropriate character choices.
They look like welder's goggles to me, And yes, that's pretty fragile for eyewear. And yes, inappropriate behavior for a doctor. Has Writer-nim even seen the inside of a hospital?
Mr. Pampire meets with Choi Kyung-In (Jin Kyung), the hospital's administrator. He is really bossy already, cause he's cool like that. Elsewhere, Ri-Ta is in a doctor's meeting. You know, one of those where they sit in a lecture hall thingy, discussing cases. She and another doctor (Kim Yu-Seok) don't agree and she gets a bit pissy. I think I don't need to learn the names of the doctors, what do you guys think?
I like Scruffy Doc, and the girl next to him was the cute investigator in Choi and Prejudice. But nah, let's see how they play out before we bother learning their names. Also: calling her a bit pissy is like saying every now and then drama writers follow a formula.
LOL, JoAnne. To me, she's just arrogant and mean. Throwing things and having a tantrum, because a fellow doctor has concerns over a risky procedure? I don't know what makes her tick, but I wish it would blow up and take her out!
Ji-sang is touring the hospital with Kyung-in, they're wearing couple coats. She explains everything to him and then, they enter the lecture hall.
But wait! One of the little gems you missed, watching raw: He demands of her, among other things: his drinking water must always have a PH of 8; his meals must be catered in, since he won't eat cafeteria food; he requires box seats to some baseball team, and they must be near the dugout.  She agrees to these things with the dazed smile of a woman in thrall to a vampi... oooh, I see what they did there.
Star-powered people have the right to request that stuff. Of course, it's usually done before signing a contract.
He witnesses the discussion between the doctors ... but when he recognizes the woman who broke his sunglasses, he makes a snide remark. And puts the sunglasses on. Kyung-in tells everybody who he is and they go "woaaah, it's the genius". Only Ri-Ta isn't impressed. He shows how incredibly smart he is by suggesting an appleby operation. He pronounces it like apple bee.
That's not how you pronounce Appleby? (It is? DAMN, his English is better than mine!!!) I googled, but that was pointless. Except now I can tell you, Squeeglets, they pulled out NO STOPS when it comes to realistic medical writing. There is, in fact, an Appleby Procedure, and it is, in fact, used in cases just like this.
I thought it was just a restaurant. They have good queso dip! Still, Google Fu skills do not a script make.
Everybody is like "wooaaaaah, he is so brilliant". Even Ri-ta has to admit it. Maybe it's the sunglasses that sway her, because WOW, how cool is it when you wear sunglasses indoors at meetings.
Mostly they're like 'Who the fuck is he? Who died and left him boss? He's too young to be the boss!' And if you're Ri-Ta, it's like 'Pout! Sneer! Flounce!'
And 'He's saying exactly what I want to say to that snot-nosed biatch!'
Humor alert: he gets up and the left glass falls out of his sunglasses again.
And with that small gesture, we are reminded that the bampire is human, too, and our hearts are touched. Genius.
Back in his room, he struts a bit and is a bit annoyed. He opens a special safe and puts in his pampire chewing gum. He then dons his white coat and struts down the hall. Jo Jae-yoon Doctor is complaining to Kyung-in about just bringing in Ji-sang like that - I'm sure he doesn't care much. Of course, Ri-ta is also very unhappy and expresses that by loudly complaining in the corridor. Ji-sang hears that and goes like "get over it, I was right and am smarter".
The bampire speaks truth to Ri-Ta. I think we see a tad of amusement, but that could just be the overlay of Lee Jeong Suk and Kang Sora I keep applying to the hospital scenes. Jo Jae-yoon is having a hissy fit composed of equal parts jealousy and insecurity, and if he drinks and walks into things I will cheer. Kyung-In is still smiling the lobotomized smile.
She goes into the operating room to operate. Ji-sang is now upstairs to observe, with other doctors. Cool, Kim Kap-Soo comes in! He is so happy to see Ji-sang, the new genius. Jo Jae-yoon Doctor (ah, I found him on asiawiki, his name is Woo Il-Nam) is visibly jealous. Uh-oh. It seems like Kim Kap-soo (whose drama name is Yoo Seok-Joo) is Rita's uncle. I already see that she and Ji-sang are a perfect match, because she's also suuuper cool and sure of herself. Her dad tells Pampire what a genius she is. Such a good doctor! And so funny and light-hearted when operating!
I hate her with the fire of a thousand burning suns. Also, Kim Gap Soo is her uncle. I think her parents were killed by that mini Blue Man Group in the forest.
Either that, or they're now pampires
She's a big brat. She says that she doesn't use her uncle's influence in any way, and yet, throws her weight and acts like her poop doesn't stink. Blech. Where's her Truck Of Doom? Where's her amnesia? And, OMG, being flirtatious and NOT PAYING ATTENTION when you already know it's a riskier-than-normal procedure?  Your uncle is the ONLY reason you have a hospital job when you should be serving Jollibee Padala by bicycle.
I think Shuk hates her.
Oh damn! But then, things start go wrong!!! Kust like Ji-sang just said. Blood splatters all over Rita's face. Can she save the patient?! Can she?! Somebody do something, quick! The tension! It's KILLLING ME! But where is Ji-sang?! He strutted down ... and into his room. He was craving secret chewing-gum. Armed that way, he enters the operating room strutting, kicks Rita out and saves the patient, the day, the year, everything. It's incredible!! (even Rita has to admit it) It was totally last minute, too. So. Much. Blood.
I will chop her into tiny pieces and feed her to the CGI wolves.
Her freakout was laughable at best. His save was totally contrived at best. This is the worst.
Hey, I like his neck. He should operate without a shirt.
He's too skinny, and not in the sometimes-sexy way that the King of Puppies is. In fact, I don't consider this kid a puppy at all.  He's just sort of there in my Kdrama Universe, like the free toy you get with a McDonald's meal and immediately throw away because you couldn't care less about it. Unless it's a mini one of those little stuffed animals everyone went crazy for 20 years ago. (He's not one of them.)
Nope, keep that juvenile ab-less body away from me.
Rita is so worked up over the humiliation, she can't even.
I love you. That was perfect.
She's pissed off that he saved the patient's life. Whom she put into jeopardy by not paying attention to that patient on the operating table AFTER the rest of the doctors thought the whole thing was a bad idea.
She hates that new guy so much! She vents to her doctor friend, Choi Soo-Eun (Jung Hye-Seong), who is a total traitor, cause she thinks Ji-sang is totally sexy - like the rest of the female staff, of course. She then butts some more head with Ji-sang, who treats her like a dumb secretary and thinks she's the most untalented, hateful woman he has ever seen. She does help him in that belief by acting very snippy and aloof all the time. Bottom line: they don't like each other. I think we get it.
He gives her a pass on her grievous error as a 'welcoming day' gift from him. Her only duty is to replace his designer original one-of-a-kind glasses that he stood in line for hours to buy when he was in Chile.
Should have used EBay.
We meet another cast member, the robot Luuvy, but only briefly. Ji-sang is home and talks to his grave-friend, who has tons of interesting information for him and is also his chemist/doctor and supplier of the secret chewing gum. The enemy is near! Ji Jin-hee is in the car with Kim Kap-soo, discussing him. It was Jae-Wook's influence that got Ji-sang into that hospital! Now that the boy is near, he is very happy.
Luuvy stuns me with his natural acting and brilliant character choices. The friend is funny, actually. I wonder how he came to know Ji Sang's deepest darkest secret?
Maybe the girl in pink was actually him. His parents wanted a girl, so they forced him to wear ugly pink hats and ugly pink sweaters. But when his eyes met his forest savior, he new he would never have to wear pink again. That's a look of love, right there. Or Luuv.
Ji-sang relaxes on a ... bed (?) when Hyun-Woo comes in to give him a first-day-at-work present: Luuvy! Ji-sang thinks it's a bit annoying (I think, I still haven't mastered the art of reading his face) but Hyun-woo thinks he needs company. He does, cause all he does at night is watch old videos of his mother and himself (it feels like forever but is "only" 5 full minutes long), while he kinda cries. He even tries to kiss his mother's huge face on the huge screen. Life as a pampire is SO HARD. But there will be a cure one day, don't you worry, kiddo.
He sleeps on a literal bed of mist. Like Ri-Ta, I cannot even.
So his internal temperature is 25C / 77F, but he needs a dry-ice bed to sleep? Is he secretly pyrokinetic? Maybe we should call Hellboy.
Oh fuck, the hooded pampires are back! Stuff just got really interesting. NOT. Also, you absolutely must know that Rita gets home and has a little "I'm-so-annoyed" fit on the sofa.
If her pouty little scream continues to be her go-to 'acting choice' I may have to hurt a tiny puppy. Don't make me do it, Ri-Ta!
Ugh. I think my face is turning purple from everything I want to say about her (but can't). Why is she even breathing?? It's such a waste of perfectly good oxygen that could be used to create rust somewhere. Grrrrrr.
So whatever Ji-sang lies on is really his bed. It looks like it's made of plastic?
And mist. Don't forget the mist.
He gets up and stretches himself. Really? Because, in my copy, this is where he watches his mom's advice about hiding, with the baby video and the crying. And then, we're with Jae-Wook. I like how this drama is jumping from scene to scene so effortlessly. Jae-wook has special yellow stuff to drink in a specially secured fridge/safe!! Damn ... does he have the cure?! Ah, no, it's some kind of drug, cause he passes out immediately, smiling happily. He's totally tripping.
Dude is tripping BALLS.
Kind of looks like he's drinking his own pee...
I refuse to recap Luuvy scenes.
Luuvy is concerned that Ji Sang doesn't eat properly. Also, I can't remember if it was this scene or not where Luuvy demonstrated his skills at engaging with women, which are based on those of the room-mate. One gem: 'What color are your underpants?' See how whimsical? How can you not love them both?
Plot Device R2D2. I'm just waiting for the exposition to spout from that speakerbox. Plus, I'm predicting Sidekick bites it in the end, and Pamipire's only solace is talking to that thing. Also, it has a secret compartment with a lightsaber some object he will need in a later episode, 
At the hospital, Ji-sang runs into Rita, who has fixed his sunglasses. He is very surprised (I think) and also a bit flustered.
She bought him a new pair. At first I thought she must be a miracle-worker, considering they were limited edition, purchased in Chile - but no, she bought them from the kiosk out front. Bampire got played in Chile. I love the subtle way they remind us that deep down, he's still just a fallible young man. He is not just bampire!
That woman should not be allowed to one up a Mario Brothers mushroom, let alone Pampire.
They're recruiting new doctors (in English). There is a female doctor Min Ga-Yeon (Son Soo-Hyun) who doesn't speak English (blasphemy!!!) but wants to be a doctor because she needs to heal her mother. Ji-sang is hard pressed on time (he has a meeting with a secret contact soon), so he tells her she can start tomorrow. He's cool like that. He also immediately spots good talent.
She chose to interview there because they gave her mother 8 months of life (suffering from uterine cancer, how enjoyable!) rather than the two months promised elsewhere. He hired her because 'people who look like her don't need much sleep.'
Sounds about right for the hiring practises of THIS hospital. I snorted milk when Pita said feelings are not needed to be a surgeon. And what's with the merengue music?
Time for the nurses to swoon over Ji-sang a bit. Cause there's not medical drama without cheeky nurses, right?
Ok that bit made me laugh. They proudly give their names to which he responds, 'I only need your positions. It's not like we're going to be friends.'
The side of my mouth might have twitched upwards. Might have.

Ji-sang struts through the corridors, when he suddenly ... hears something, a faint, wailing sound. "Wailing" sound?  Or "Whaling" sound, because it sounded like a humpback call to me. Or maybe I'm tripping on my diet cream soda. It is the color of  Handsome Bastard's Tripp-N-Drink.
Is it genius doctor and drug addict Jae-wook, who is giving a witty, charming (used-car salesman-eque) talk in front of all the doctors? Yes!!! Ji-sang enters the lecture hall and the two men lock eyes. Outside, they meet - Ji-sang refuses to shake Jae-wook's hand, his instincts tells him DANGEREU.
I have a question. If one bampire recognizes the proximity of another by the buzzing in his ears, why did he not have that with his parents? IS the Handsome Bastard a bampire? He wasn't drinking blood. I bet it was straight plasma, though, because he's hardcore. You can tell by his steely glare and his fake bonhomie.
Wait. Jae-wook is the hospital manager, so how can he talk about fulfilling his duty as a surgeon? If you hold the purse strings, you don't hold the scalpel. That's what happens when you transfer to Administration, Except at 34 번가의 기적 병원.
I've come to the conclusion that he's maybe a fallen angel. The music gives it away and all the heaven-stuff in his apartment
At the next doctor meeting, Jae-wook volunteers Ji-sang for a complicated surgery. He really can't refuse without blowing cover, but what about his meeting? Will he be able to handle this situation? He rushes to his room to get secret chewing gum, but DAMN! Somebody else (in sneakers) snuck in, using sticky tape to trick the thumb scanner, somebody who knows the passcode to the chewing gum safe! When he has strutted in and tries to access his secret files on the computer, somebody has changed the password. That doesn't make him suspicious though and he goes and gets himself some chewing gum before starting the operation.
He should have called his IT troubleshooter immediately; a changed password means a hack. Ooh, okay I admit I kind of care, at least 1/100000th of an angstrom more than I did before. Wonder what the half-life of my interest will be, And if that seemed like a math-science mishmash, you're right. Still less confusing than this thing.
But it was FAKE secret chewing gum! It's not working! Jae-wook, who watches from above, smirks. Oh no, oh no, oh no ... there is no dampening effect on the bloodlust! Ji-sang cannot operate... he starts transforming!!! Jae-wook leans forward, expectantly.
When you hide the lower half of his face, expertly shade his cheekbones, and turn his eyes green, THEN he becomes puppy material.
Maybe the mask was made of fairy blood and baby animal fur, too? Like his scarf?


Another incredible cliffhanger! Wow, the suspense is KILLING me! Will he be able to control his nature? Will he kill everybody? Jae-wook is such an evil dick for testing him that way.
Can Monday get here soon enough, Kakashi? Not for me!
Where's the 2nd container of New and Improved??

You might have guessed, episode 2 was really good! NOT. Not one bit of it was good. Not even Ji Jin-hee, the poor man. You know, when the majority of actors act really badly, there is a rush to the bottom. Why even try, man, why even try.
Gu Hye Sun needs money to finance her next gallery exhibition; Ahn Jae Hyun was flattered anyone knew his name and thought to ask, and Ji Jin Hee got caught doing something naughty with an intern at his management company, so he couldn't refuse the part.
Then what is our excuse for watching? And how did my eonni's get  me involved in this? I think I may need to stock up on diet cream soda to make sense of this. Or soju. Or both.
Hey Rocky! Let's watch them pull a plot out of a hat!