Old Nine Gates 老九门 - Episode 5 (Recap)

SakiVI: As before, Ba Ye alternately freaks out and gung-hos ahead, Lt Zhang is pretty, and Fo Ye is masterful.
We also learn more about Hatoyama and the tomb, and we meet Jiu Ye. And, fortunately, not much time was spent on Chen Pi. Sadly, though, no Er Ye, but not so sadly, no Ya Tou (sorry to fans of that actress: it's not her, it's the writing).
kakashi: I'm really in it for the grave robbing and the scary stuff, like blood walkers and other type of zombies. Skip all that Yatou zombie-stuff though, cause she's not scary enough. I WANT TOMBS! Tombs with Fo Ye in them.

Episode 5 - Cave Quest

Yes, we're still at that hideous statue. Ba Ye says it means something important is hidden there because the statue represents the Mother of Heaven or something. Guise, a statue can't do anything, except maybe fall on you. But I digress.
It's a very scary looking Mother of Heaven, grant you. If she is in heaven,  I'd rather not go there. Assuming Fo Ye doesn't quite make it there either, I'm good
The real Heaven is full of companions totally to our taste and interests. I learned that during Ramadan lectures. Be a good person, and you will get your Fo Ye. Fighting!
I hope this is not a trick!
Again, with the old man saying, wasn't me! Whatever, dude.
It's quite the hilarious running gag though, haha. 10 people dead, no hair, tattoos, horribly decomposed bodies? "Wasn't me!" - entry to the tomb completely blocked cause explosion! "Wasn't me!" - Mine completely under water. "Wasn't me!" - Fo Ye's boots all dirty? "Wasn't me!" - what is that smell? "Wasn't me!!!"
Fo Ye is totally getting excited, though.
Yes, he still really really really want to go in the cave.
I'd go with him, sigh.
Old man begs them not to go in any further because it's haunted. There are weird sounds! I'm getting scared. They all get rough with him. I don't like that, actually. Seriously, it's not necessary, and he is old. They can just block his path. But I don't think Fo Ye likes anyone putting a damper on his goals. And Ba Ye is busy scolding the old man for having no faith in Zhang Da Fo Ye when, just a few minutes ago, he himself was telling Fo Ye, "Noooooo, not in theeeeerrre!"
Well, they just really want to go into the cave and they know the old man knows something.
Finally, the old man talks.
See, Fo Ye screaming at him worked! 
And complicated it is too. It goes back to when people did those half-head Qing dynasty shaves with long plaits at the back. (And we are only at 1 minute and 49 seconds into this episode.) Woah, the people all look like prisoners with those white uniforms and numbers.
That's because they are. Labor camp, I'd say. 
A labor camp would have people in chains, though. These people all seem happy and free.
The old man's old man was some sort of foreman in the mines, and the Japanese had bought the mines ages ago even then. But then the miners dug a hole (yes, that's what they do), and there was something weird in there.
Uh-oh! I see something we've seen before! 
They see a really creepy tunnel covered in those thick cobwebs, urgh.
Yes, those!! 
By the way, I just love that wonderous lighting they always have underground. Imagine how annoying if it were pitch-black! We wouldn't be able to see anything! 
These tomb raiders all develop supernatural see-in-the-dark vision.
The old man tells them the mine was from the Qing Dynasty. For some reason, Fo Ye questions this. I dunno why, but it's probably not a good idea to question Fo Ye back.
It doesn't look all that Qing Dynasty to me either, Fo Ye. *brofist*
Back to the story. The Japanese owner and the mine foreman and a few miners went into the cobweb tunnel. Oh, it's that dude from episode 1, Hatoyama Nakagama.
Hi, Hatoyama. You still look like barely 20.
The old man's old man noted that Hatoyama was able to walk the long tunnel without needing rest. This suggested Skillz. Then, someone impart those Skillz to sickly Ya Tou fast.
Tomb-walking skills? That seems like a lame superpower though.
Just loads of chi. [Sidebar: Er Ye needs to share his chi with Ya Tou so she can stop annoying us all.] 
They came to the tomb, and wow!
This is just like the one in The Lost Tomb! Must be how tombs are made.
Maybe they used the same set? I would be okay with it, really.
Skilled Hatoyama reads a note on the tomb door: "Ye Who Enter Here, All Hope Abandon." Ooh, nice antique sentence structure. The Japanese man just smirks. Clearly, he's not impressed.
Do they mean: "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here"?
Oh, and now we know why Hatoyama wasn't impressed. Since when did ancient Chinese tombs take quotes from Dante's Divine Comedy? I'm frankly embarrassed I didn't recognize it.
It's because they turned that sentence around weirdly, *pat pat*. 
Yes, that must be it.  Thanks, kakashi.
Anyway, Fo Ye wonders what all this has to do with the the Japanese and the old man is very panicky at the thought of Hell.
See, Saki? Fo Ye isn't much interested in Dante either
You did leave all those people unburied, buddy. Anyway, back to the story of the old man's old man. Hatoyama and his unnamed Japanese colleague opened the tomb doors, and told the miners to leave.
They wanted all the riches for themselves! Booooo! 
The miners all scraped and bowed and smiled, and as soon as the Japanese went into the tomb, went up for a look.
Well, done, poor prisoners.
Or, disloyal employees?
The miners planned to kill the the Japanese overlords and take whatever was good from the tomb. No doubt this was to preserve their cultural heritage.
Oh look! It's WuXie!!
Defender of Cultural Artifacts
Despite the fact that in the story the miners and the Japanese had just discovered the tomb, Fo Ye is convinced the whole thing is for secret Japanese weapons.
Yeah, well, I guess descendants from graverobber dynasties know that kind of stuff

Fo Ye, I love you, but at this point they're all just exploring and robbing, you know? Those same miners waited for ages and ages and just as they were considering giving up,
Fo Ye, I'm not doubting you at all, I'm absolutely certain you're right. Come to me!
the Japanese ran out, rocks started crashing down and black smoke billowed everywhere! The tomb doors slammed shut too.
Death and destruction, boom, don't sniff the black smoke! 
As Fo Ye listens to this story, he confirms with the old man that it was the black smoke that billowed down on everyone that chased them away. He gets all manly and say he must know how it will chase him away.
Fo Ye, you are right! A little bit of black smoke? That is nothing!
So cool. Lt Zhang tries to break down the gate, but nope, not working.
I like how he's all business and determination. I still think he'd be a great employee
Chen Pi should take some lessons.
The old man says the Japanese installed it later on. Fo Ye is even more manly and says there must be horrific things behind that gate.
He gets a slightly crazy glint in his eyes, our Fo Ye when things get dangerous. He would probably like a bedroom full of hidden trapdoors and deadly traps.
Prepare it for him! 
Fanning self even at this picture.
Ba Ye then tries to dissuade Fo Ye who tells him to leave. Ba Ye gets all hurt and says you know I can't leave by myself, and Fo Ye says, then cut the crap. He also reassures Ba Ye that he will bring Ba Ye out. Yay, Fo Ye!
Hm, I don't know, Fo Ye has a little mean-streak there. I might have to reconsider our alliance... okay, no, I won't.
It's just a lovers' tiff.
Fo Ye notes most parts of the gate have rusted. And Ba Ye, in yet another change of heart, tells Fo Ye, look I have some hydrochloric acid - is that really something to just carry around? - and Lt Zhang mocks Ba Ye. I liked Ba Ye's response.
*looks in purse*: no, no hydrochloric acid here. You?
*Checking*: what is that bottle? Oh, just some lotion.  Guess not.
Ba Ye pours the acid over the rusty hinges, and lo and behold it works. They open the gate, and the old man freaks out when he sees the statue's back. 
Cause, wait for it.... 
Ba Ye, our diviner and knower of all things occult, says, "it's just a tuft of hair."
Hair! It's HAIR! Black, think, SCARY hair!
It looks like steel wool.
Ignoring all the talismans, they go in. Yes, they really do.
It's about friggin TIME.
Poor old dude getting dragged along. Amazing cave, guise.
Fo Ye knew it. That's why he really, really, really wanted to go in
Ba Ye notes many things not put away and tries to pick up a pick axe in case of treasures. Lt Zhang snarks that even if Ba Ye found those treasures, it wouldn't be his turn to get them. Fo Ye tells them to shut up. Such a dad, that one.
He sends Ba Ye and Lt Zhang to look around. Again, one of these weird steampunk things...
Ha, maybe a washing machine!
I guess it's some sort of choo choo train machinery, and it just turned on, suggesting some sort of electricity around. Or, at any rate, steam power. All these lights come on.
Oh, it's a generator! Maybe it runs on hair? Hey, btw! Fo Ye has steampunk goggles! He comes prepared. *brofist*  
Ba Ye and Lt Zhang both note closed-up mine shafts.  
Caves and shafts. I tell you, Freud would be delighted
Fo Ye says there is definitely a secret that cannot be told here. Aw, poor old man. He looks really scared. 
Yeah, cause he knows that secret!
He should've just spoken up. Told them everything, where to go, what the matter was, everything.
Yeah. They never do though.
Fo Ye tells Ba Ye we find a mine shaft or no one leaves. Gosh, he's so determined! 
Lol, Fo Ye. Don't be so desperate.
As the old man is doing his usual wail, noooo, thar be ghosts, etc, they walk into another cave where there are bowls of water. Ba Ye finds them rather interesting. The old man just watches, almost as if he's planning when to kill them all and leave. But we know he won't because Fo Ye is there. Ba Ye notes that the things have been placed carefully because the Japanese used an onmyoji, which is their equivalent of Ba Ye.
Basically, a Japanese onmyoji will follow the Five Elements like Ba Ye and his ilk would. Then we get "water from the well will not mix with water from the river." One bowl for each so that they don't annoy each other. And I really don't understand this at all, so if anyone does, please say so in the comments.
Different energies? He also says something about the dead and the living, who both use the mine shaft together and this water is to assure they don't annoy each other. Duh, Fo Ye doesn't believe in this stuff, so I won't either!
Good point: no need to care if Fo Ye doesn't care.

Ba Ye reiterates, again, to leave speedily from there. But when the old man yell about ghosts, Ba Ye gets all tough again, exasperated sigh. Back to trying to persuade Fo ye not to continue, but Fo Ye just pours out the water from the river bowl and says, "let's go." Hee.
Ahahaaa, what a dick! 
Poor Ba Ye: he's so upset at the taboo!
Hahahaaaa, Fo Ye is so mean!
Switch scene to this lovely tea house. Seriously, what does Changsha look like now? I want to go there.
Let's go together! 
I'm holding you to this, sensei.
We get to see a chess match. One man, a Mr. Kong, is up against many chess boards. That's one way to get some exercise. Behind the screen is our Jie Jiu / Jiu Ye, or Ninth Gate.
He's yummy! You'll see once we get to see him
Mr. Kong loses all the games, but is happy enough about it. Jiu Ye explains to his buddies afterwards that he purposely lost his first match with Mr. Kong, and, I think, pretended to put up a fight with these last matches just so Mr. Kong would think his own skills were still really good. After Jiu Ye's fan club leaves, he calls out a bunch of others who all say they couldn't win against Mr. Kong but Jui Ye managed to win 6 times. They get money from Jiu Ye's missus as well. I don't follow this at all.
Well. neither did I, but! I got that we are to think he's a Cool Cat. And he is!
Ah, it turns out they all played the 6 matches and lost to Mr. Kong. Okay, I don't see why Jiu Ye bothered. But here's a pretty picture that's all Art Deco-ish.
I really don't know what all that chess business was supposed to show. 
Anyway, here's another picture of the room.
Just establishing his character, I'm sure! This is from laymerence's blog about him: He is "Meticulous and strict lifestyle, master of strategy and great at chess: And Master Jie Jiu is someone who does everything by the book, without any gaps. Before an incident occurs, he would have thought of every single possible outcome. And he will have a counter-strategy to everything. Which may be why no one is willing to make an enemy of him.”
Not my style. Shows he's rich, though. 
Oh, I wouldn't say no. There's more info on Jie: ”… he is the only traditional scholar, and even studied abroad in Japan for a year. The Jie Family is a model-like family, unlike the families described above, the Jie Family’s strongest feature, is that they are unexceptional. Jie Family is the family with the most equal distribution of power…
And so, the Jie Family is the one that runs the most stable business out of the Nine Gates. Although they don’t make the most money, but there were never any huge waves. No one looks for trouble, no one looks for help.“
He's also got ears and eyes everywhere, since a minion tells him Fo Ye has gone to the mine. And now Jiu Ye expects he won't get much rest. To be honest, I wouldn't get any rest in that room. It's lush, but distinctly unrestful.
Yeah, and too many thoughts about Fo Ye kinda do that to you.

Back to our Gang, yay! 
Ba Ye notices some mark in a piece of wood. He gets scared and tells Fo Ye, no, don't open this!
A sure way to get him to open it immediately. 
Lt Zhang rolls his eyes.
Ba Ye refuses to tell, and Fo Ye says whatever, he'll tell anyway because he's like that, pffft. Then, Old man sees something scary and runs away.
Bye, bye! 
Fo Ye says to let him go because no reason to keep him any more.
Fo Ye! You could have let him go earlier, you meanie!
Fo Ye thinks the old man doesn't know any more. Ba Ye explains that every beam has a notch and there are loads of nooses which means lots of people were hung to death in the mining cave. The manly men smirk at all this, but for once, I'm on Ba Ye's side. All those hangings in one place is pretty creepy.
Are we getting to the Zombies yet?
Not yet.
Fo Ye just likes it here.
Old man continues to run from whatever it is he is seeing in the air.  Since this is the Daomu universe, we know there is something, we just don't know what as yet. 
I can't wait! I'll just keep the lights on.
Our three bros keep moving on, united in their love for Fo Ye.  Oh, wait, that's kakashi and me!
hi there! I have caves! 
Fo Ye looks into a barrel of water where the water is bubbling.  
You forgot to use the word "hotly" in that sentence.
Okay, Fo Ye smoulders at a barrel of water where the water is bubbling.
Ba Ye thinks water is coming up from a hole below the barrel. The point of the barrel was to block the hole and drive away evil spirits. I wonder how it was supposed to do that? No, wait, don't tell me. I've enough to deal with in this show. 

Hilarious: as Ba Ye is discussing evil spirits, Fo Ye motions to Lt Zhang for his gun, shoots into the barrel, makes the water swirl downwards, and hands the gun back. Gosh, I love Chipmunk Hunk!
Hahaaaaa, the humor in this drama is JUST GREAT.
And we get our totally dry grave robbers' hole.  
Not all holes can be wet - but this one really should be! 
It requires some extra digging, but it's how our Gang will get into the tomb. Luckily some shovels are conveniently nearby.
And Fo Ye and Lt Zhang get into digging because Ba Ye is too weak.  Aw, not only is this funny, but it's also sweet because Fo Ye knows Ba Ye's limitations.
Or, maybe not so sweet. 
Nah, he just really, really, REALLY wants to enter that new passage.
Of course, Fo Ye jumps right down into the tunnel below.
But Lt Zhang just pushes Ba Ye down, and when he lands face down, Fo Ye tells him to stop pretending and get up. Sigh, Ba Ye. I think your love is a bit one-sided.
I'm laughing so hard. I feel horrible.
Lt Zhang makes a point of landing on Ba Ye. Okay, that was a bit too much, cute though you are, Lt Zhang!
Still laughing. They're horrible. I'm horrible. We can be horrible together.
They bicker over whether Lt Zhang did this on purpose, and Fo Ye tells the two of them to stop bickering. 
Such a dad.
Also, Lt Zhang looks pretty. 
We really cannot say this enough.
It's what he's really for.
As they walk through the tunnel, Fo Ye notices bits of wood that are similar to the coffins on the death train from episode one. He gets a vision of people moving those coffins along. Ba Ye states the obvious, that the wood must've broken off the coffins. Fo Ye guesses the the coffins were dragged through this mine shaft, and he now thinks the mine dates back to the early Qing Dynasty. 
If you say so, Fo Ye
Really, 400 years? (Yes, I looked it up.)
Ba Ye notes there were not trains and railroads in the 17th century and Fo Ye wonders if the early miners made the coffins when the mine shaft was first opened, or if they discovered the coffins when the mine was opened. But what they were mining? 
I don't know, can we get to the TOMBS already?
My bad: mining is not important here.
Fo Ye has enough of all these deep thoughts and barks at Ba Ye to move.  Then, of all things, they hear Er Ye's opera singing. 
Now THAT you've got to explain to me! 
Cut to the Hong Mansion. Yawn, why? And I like the place, I'm a fan of the design and the colours and would love a house just like that one day, minus the Chen Pi, of course, but I really want to continue in the mine. Anyway, look, The Hong Mansion is still pretty.
Chen Pi is thinking.  
Let's appreciate the nose
The Nose Knows.
The Nose Remembers?
And then he sees blood on one of Ya Tou's mint green hankies.
Uh-oh, I'd say.
Eh, I've been watching Queen Insoo on the side, and a character there coughs up blood, and that character is nowhere near as active and healthy-looking as Ya Tou. So, this blood could be from anything. Also, the maids should've cleaned this up. Bad housekeeping here.
So, supposedly, she's been coughing up blood. Okay, so she has bronchitis, congestive heart failure, lung cancer or what? (Yes, I looked up options.)
She has death-sickness, Saki. Just believe it.
I can't though! I can believe hair on a statue, light in underground tombs and Ba Ye's fortune-telling ability, but I can't believe Ya Tou isn't anything but a hyperchondriac.

Chen Pi strides into the Changsha American Chamber of Commerce looking for Ryouko Tanaka.
The minion tries to stop him, but Chen Pi declares this is Chinese territory (no, Chen Pi, it's not) and demands to know which of the rooms he needs.
Well, you know.... depends on how you see things.
U.S. diplomatic territory, so US territory. Like an embassy.
Chen Pi doesn't believe in that stuff. 
He says if Ryouko Tanaka doesn't come out, he'll tear the place apart. She does come out, with a lot of guards, but Chen Pi doesn't care. He offers his services in place of Er Ye.
Oh well... 
Why does she only have one suit?


Wow, that tomb is looking deep! And why Er Ye's singing in the mine? It's like Er Ye has a ghost. Okay, I guess he will soon, considering Ya Tou is coughing up blood. Or, did some monster hear Er Ye singing, and copy him? In one of the Grave Robbers' Chronicles, there are snakes that can parrot human speech and sound exactly like the people they are mimicking. I wonder how Fo Ye will deal with whatever it is? Probably very efficiently. 
He'll kill it. He's kinda cool like that. 

Jui Ye hasn't made much of an impression on me so far. He seems rather pompous, and I don't understand why he was tricking that Mr. Kong. It seemed rather random. I liked his ditzy wifey, though. I hope she turns out sharper than she's acting later on. 
Haha, I doubt that! It was a very short introduction, granted. I like his looks though! The gold-rimmed glasses are classy and he seems like a guy with both feet on the ground. He will be useful.
He is handsome, I agree. But I would be annoyed with a man playing games with games.

Now, the Japanese who were there earlier: I wonder if Hatoyama will turn up again? He's clearly the Japanese counterpart of one of the Changsha 9 Gates. He can walk and walk and walk without getting tired, and he knows how to open massive tomb doors. But whatever he saw freaked him out enough to leave in a big hurry and never return.  
Oh, I thought he ran long and hard and will never ever look back. There is something very scary down there......... (I hope)