Surprise (2015) 万万没想到 - Part 3 (Movie Recap)

kynkari:  It is my humble belief that this is the best part of the movie.  My opinion has nothing to do with the fact that Murong Bai is a “spank-me-until-I’m-cross-eyed”  evil bad boy in this section.  Not at all. *coughliescough*

SakiVI: It is in fact my total belief that this is the best part of the movie, and it's completely because Murong Bai turned sexy evil bad boy.

Settle in and grab some popcorn. We have lots to cover and plenty of Ma Tianyu visuals.  Squee!

I'll just get my tea.

Anyone who guesses who this is, gets a Jaehyo pic.

Part 3

Dachui and Xiao Mei have had their romantic night under the stars, but now it is time to put all of their training into action and beat up Tony the Tiger.  They find him in his Tiger cave, and Wukong throws a carrot at him just to make sure he isn’t a rabbit demon... because… well his costume is awful.

Even though the costume is awful, there's no way that's a rabbit. Is there?

Thundercats, Hoooooooo!

Not taking kindly to being pelted with a carrot, or with several fireplace shovels that Xiao Mei throws at him, Tony roars loudly and goes in for the kill!  Of course, our three heroes run screaming. Reasonable response. Tony pursues them in a very awkward, yet oddly familiar manner.  After pondering this for a moment, I realized that My 9 year old son scurries to the bathroom in just this way when he has to pee really bad.

Tony running after our heroes awkwardly.

My kid running to the bathroom awkwardly.

Tony catches up with Dachui, Xiao Mai and Wukong and backs them into a corner with a menacing growl. In terror and desperation, Wukong starts pulling various vegetables out of his clothing (?) and throwing them at Tony.  But wait!  He has a fish in his left pocket and tosses it at the Tiger demon.  Tony’s reaction to the smell of fish is quite… dramatic.

Meow.

I.

Can’t.

Even.

With.

This.

Next.

Part.

The fish reaction gives Dachui an idea!  He fashions a cat toy out of grass and Tony can’t resist.  While he is distracted by playing with the grass, Xiao Mei beats him soundly with her fireplace shovel.   She then gets the idea to use a mirror to create a laser pointer. Cats can’t resist a laser pointer!!

This was so funny, I was almost literally ROFL'ing.

Dachui uses this diversion to beat Tony up with a big stick.   A ball of yarn with a bell inside appears, and then Dachui has the best idea of all! A box!  All cats love boxes! True. Using his unique magical abilities with vegetation, he makes a giant box out of flower stems and vines, and Tony crawls inside, trapping himself.  They knock him out and win the battle!

I have no idea why this part struck me so hysterical, but I watched it multiple times.  Have you heard of the phrase “so ugly it’s cute”? This is so stupid it’s funny.  Very, very funny. Exactly!

Dachui is pretty proud of himself. He vanquished Tony the Tiger and he found Xiao Mei’s wallet.  He is a hero!

He thinks this is a great time to confess his feelings to Xiao Mei, but Wukong interrupts him and they start fighting.  Wukong is furious that his magical monkey elixir is nowhere to be found and he blames Dachui.  

Wukong is a bit annoying.

Meanwhile, back in the transparent bell, the Tang Monk is eating all the food and making Piggy and Eyebrow-Man give him backrubs.  I’m starting to think this Monk controls all of his friends. They all seem to be wearing a similar mind-controlling crown.

Probably the case. I didn't look this up this time.

As an aside, I noted that the actor playing Piggy is named Mike D’Angelo.  Say what now?  This name sounds awfully … Italian. Our Lakorn-watching readers can correct me if I'm wrong, but a lot of Thai actors are mixed.  Piggy doesn’t look Italian to me, so I decided to check out the actor.  Mary Mother of Pearl!  Ladies (and gentlemen, if there are any reading), I give you, Mike D’Angelo:

It’s a damned shame to cover all of this up with a Piggy costume…

Want another one?  Okay, I’ll give it to you:

He's one of those actors who sometimes looks good to me, and other times not.

Let’s just say I now have an enhanced interest in bacon, and my interest in bacon was already quite enhanced.

Back to our story.  

Wukong is furious with Dachui and Xiao Mei and flounces off in a huff.  Dachui suggests that they take the unconscious Tony the Tiger back to the village so that they can be hailed as heroes, but Xiao Mei thinks they should just go to tell Murong Bai and let him handle it.  Uh oh.  Wrong answer.  They get into a fight and she stomps away.

I'm with her, because that would get Murong Bai into the picture again.

Back at creepy cave, Murong Bai is working some magical evil spirit fighting moves by the festering green pond in his living room.  The demon voice is now tempting him constantly, and he is growing very weak.  He starts seeing visions of a shadowy figure with glowing eyes that taunts him about his failing health.  Murong Bai tries to strike out at the demon but only flails and falls down.  Don’t hurt our boo!

Nooooooo!

I think we all know where this is going….

So, so pretty.

Dachui drags Tony the Tiger, bound and still passed out, into the center of Stone Ox village so that he can brag about what a great hero he is.  Everyone is very impressed, until Tony wakes up and breaks free of the vines binding him.  Oops.  

Once again, Dachui messes up.

Tony is stronger now, because somehow a bit of the demon spirit has infused him with power.  He begins to beat up/maim/kill everyone in the village, and it is all Dachui’s fault.  The movie becomes very serious in this scene, and it’s this dichotomy that makes me love it even more. Dachui learns a valuable lesson about the true meaning of being a hero.  It’s not just about glory and praise. He also gets a painful reminder that your fans can be fickle and will turn on you in a heartbeat.

Ask any celebrity, especially minor ones. 

Hmmm... interesting observation.

Murong Bai shows up, and he isn’t looking too good. That sickly pallor and dark circles under his eyes looks like every Chinese actor at the end of filming a 60+ episode drama.  Eat something and take a nap!!!  

My poor baby. Come to jiejie to make it better.

I will apply eye cream for you, Murong Bai. My body is ready.

He gets soundly beaten by Tony, unable to fight him effectively in his weakened state.

As he is laying on the ground bleeding from his perfectly shaped lips (trufax re the perfect lips), he hears the villagers whispering about him, and something inside finally snaps.  Green fire flashes in his eyes and he stands, unleashing fury and power upon Tony.  He is stronger than he has ever been, but there is something wrong with him.  He has an evil aura.  Tony dies with a sword through his heart, but not before we find out that this was all part of the demon’s plan.

Yikes, I'm scared now!

The villagers turn on Dachui, blaming him for the catastrophe.  They kick and beat him him as he lay curled in a ball in the dirt, reaching for a doll that Xiao Mei had given him as a gift.  Dayum.  Even though this was all his fault, I feel terrible for him.

Me too, a bit.

Xiao Mei tries to help, but the crowd pushes her back.  She begs Murong Bai to stop the mob and he tells them to quit beating Dachui, but it’s clear that Murong Bai is not himself.  He has a crazy look in his eyes and is sporting some heavy green eyeshadow (Urban Decay in Mildew if you ask me, which begs the question, why does Urban Decay have an eyeshadow called Mildew? Ew.)

It doesn't matter what an eyeshadow is called when someone incredibly pretty is wearing it.

Hey baby, I like your man-bun.

Later that evening, Xiao Mei approaches Murong Bai’s cave and sees him finally give in to the demon, vowing to sacrifice all the souls in the village so that he can gain immortality.

Since I'm very attracted to Murong Bai, I'm going to give him a pass this one time. He's been through a lot.

He suddenly turns very evil and tremendously sexy.  She confronts him, and he asks her to marry him and join him in immortality. Awwwww.  Demon lurve!  <3  The only way Ma Tianyu will propose to a girl is if he is possessed by an evil demon. Sounds about right.

I will propose to him, then.

She agrees, as long as he releases Dachui who he his holding prisoner.  He has also chained up the cute puppy!  He releases them both, and Dachui notes that although Bai’s long hair is rather greasy, he is willing to stay for dinner as long as it is hot pot.  Murong Bai-Demon isn’t pleased.

What are you up to, Dachui?

Mmm… hotpot.

Xiao Mei tells Dachui that she is going to marry Murong Bai.  She is very cruel and throws her wallet at him, telling him that they owe each other nothing now and he needs to leave town immediately. Tough love. Obviously she is trying to protect him, but he is crushed.  He leaves town, dejected and depressed.  As he wanders, he comes across the Tang Monk, Piggy and Eyebrow-Man trapped in the bell.  

And no one else saw them?

I just realized that Eyebrow-Man is the director of the movie! Hahaha!

The next bit is a very clever and funny game of charades, where they try to tell him that they need help and he thinks they are giving him advice about his love life.  He interprets their frantic movements as encouraging him to not give up and go save Xiao Mei from Murong Bai!

Trust Dachui to get it wrong.

Murong Bai, now fully evil (but still hot, this is important), starts to reverse the circle and unseal the demon. Dachui sees the green clouds form over Stone Ox Village just as he passes the place where he first entered the portal in the woods. He throws himself into the portal hoping it will be a shortcut so that he can hurry and save Xiao Mei.  

Below Murong Bai’s lair, Dachui meets up with the ghost of the first Murong ancestor, who tells him that he is actually a stone spirit and is the only one who can save the village from the demon!  There is mention of a horcrux, and a purple golden calabash, and whole Star Wars “Help Me Obi-Wan” homage in this scene.

Murong Bai’s great great great great great Grandpa.

Dachui jams a chopstick in the seal to keep it from reversing, and Murong Bai is pissed.  He is about to kill Dachui when Wukong (aka: Monkey King) shows up, who Murong Bai traps against a rock.  I wish he would trap me against a rock.

Hmm, I think I'll just let him hug me.  

Let’s just get this out of the way and do an evil Murong Bai collage, shall we?

I have a very dirty fanfiction planned out in my head based on these images.

Fanning self now. No fanfic needed.

Luckily, Wukong’s horse (who I think is also a demon?) has found his magical monkey golden elixir and gives it to him just in time by shooting it out of his nose and into Wukong’s mouth. Gross. Animals don't care about snot. Monkey King is back, and he is ready to kick Murong Bai’s ass!

He’s back!

He handily beats Murong Bai and knocks the evil demon out of our sweet, handsome hero.  Thank goodness.  Okay, sure, but I liked evil Murong. Monkey lets the limp body of Murong Bai fall onto the floor of his cave, which I thought was a tad rude.  Murong Bai can’t help it if an evil demon possessed his gorgeous (if not miniscule and likely hairless) body. Somebody catch him!

I

The demon is not pleased with losing his human host, and flies directly into the body of Xiao Mei!  Her styling as a demon is a little… odd.  She has a whole Skeletor thing going on, but it’s definitely scarier than Murong Bai’s costume.

Meanwhile, back at Castle Greyskull...

Monkey and Dachui try to save her, but the demon inside is focused on reversing the circle and creating the immortality elixir.  Dachui suddenly makes camellia flowers bloom over her bone-armor, and reminds her that she told him once that this was her favorite flower.  Tears begin to fall from her eyes and she fights the demon, forcing it out.  Love conquers all!  

Awwww…

Okay, sure, awwww...

Nevermind.  The demon isn’t done.  It attacks again, but Murong Bai appears and apologizes for his part in releasing the evil spirit.  He recalls that he has been trained to kill demons since he was a child.  This is his purpose.  He sacrifices himself to destroy the the creature once and for all.  *sob*  

Noooooooooooooooo!!!

Noooooo!!!!

Comments:

It was inevitable, but the loss of Murong Bai sucks rocks.  This part of the movie had a lot of serious bits in it, and the plot was actually pretty good.  It still had enough jokes sprinkled throughout that it didn’t get too heavy, though.  I don’t like super heavy movies.  To console myself through Murong Bai’s transformation from hero, to sexy demon, to dead, I bravely remained focused on the eye candy. And I ate Funyuns.

I watched it without candy because Ma Tian Yu is sweet enough.

I feel like the Monk, Piggy and Eyebrow-Man storyline was only there for the (admittedly hilarious) charades scene.  Otherwise, I don’t see the purpose to the characters.  I have a self imposed rule about fast forwarding which I rarely break, but I was tempted. Maybe the scenes were in there to harness the star power of Bolin Chen and draw in viewers?

Star power, and also to bring Monkey to the scene as someone who will help Dachui.

Part 4 of the recap will wrap up the story and show some brilliant and funny outtakes and behind the scenes shots at the end of the movie.