Fanfic: Mo Yuan and Shao Wan 2.0 - Chapter 53 (Ten Miles of Peach Blossoms 三生三世十里桃花)
Chapter 53
written by kakashiedited by LigayaCroft & Panda
Right after stepping into the sanctuary of her chambers and closing the door behind her, Shao Wan let out an extensive sigh that had been building up inside of her for the better part of the long day. She felt nauseous, a feeling intensified by the dull, persistent headache pulsating behind her eyes. She had not eaten any proper food after waking early this morning- there had been little time between meetings. Besides, nothing they served had appealed to her, even just the smell of the spices routinely used in Demon food upset her stomach. For lack of any better options, she had nibbled on dried fruit and sweet, sticky pastry she had washed down with tea, but all it did was make her feel bloated and ungainly. At least she wasn’t throwing up anymore these days, but that was only a small consolation.
Staggering towards her bed like a drunken person, she sat down ungracefully. Her legs felt like heavy tree trunks and her breasts seemed to have grown more sensitive again, they were rubbing painfully against the confines of her dudou.
With another groan, she began massaging her belly. To her great joy, the little ones had started kicking occasionally. Every time she felt their movement, she wanted to shout out her excitement to the realms. Back in the Fox Den, Zhe Yan had told her it was normal to be afraid during a pregnancy, but it was not normal for her. She hated the bouts of panic she felt when waking up, brought on by the uncertainty whether everything was alright, by the fear her condition could have worsened overnight.
She was trying hard not to listen to that old woman in her dreams, but it was not easy. Your life is slowly bleeding out, your essence is seeping into the Nothingness drop for drop, more pieces of your soul are going missing one by one. And you still do not believe he is at fault?
Feeling the babies move calmed her down. If they were moving, they were well. If their movement made her this happy, she had not descended into madness yet.
Her hand fumbled for the the pendant with the Feather she was wearing around her neck again, dangling from a thin golden chain. Feeling the silky structure against her palm gave her comfort, but comfort was not enough. She had hoped that getting it back from where she had hidden it previously would solve her problems… at least some of them. But even though this was such an important part of her, it was just one missing piece of her soul - without the rest, she would not be whole. Without being whole, her fate seemed inevitable.
Even if I believe he is at fault, what does it change? Will it make me live to see my children grow up?
Was it the suffering she would have to go through that frightened her the most? If only she didn’t remember what Yu Zong had become, didn’t remember delivering the necessary death blow herself most vividly. Or was it the pain people around her would feel to see her like she had seen her advisor that made her heart quake? She wasn’t sure.
Shao Wan closed her eyes, but forced herself to remain upright. She was so very tired, her unwanted Celestial powers were a source of constant discomfort here, but there were things to do, many things in fact... opening her eyes reluctantly, she threw a look over to the desk, on which piles of scrolls waited for her attention. No, she could not sleep yet. And she needed to find a capable advisor and assistant fast. And most importantly, she needed to do what she had promised, which was go to the Soulswappers and reunite with Fong Hung.
I will come, I will come, she repeated in her head, hoping against her better judgement he would know, he would feel it, as soon as I can…
Frustrated, she hit the bedpost with her palm, hard. One of the round ornaments that were hanging from it fell down and rolled across the floor, over to the window, where it stopped in front of… a boot.
Somebody was sitting by the window.
“Mo… Mo Yuan!” Shao Wan squealed as she jumped up much faster than her belly welcomed it, her heart kicking into a frantical, almost painful beat, “what… why… are you...? How dare you not announce your presence!”
The flash of anger that raced through her was welcome for the alertness that came with it, but it was also misplaced, since seeing him was the most wonderful thing she could imagine. He looked… radiant. No longer like somebody about to keel over, but well rested, strong, handsome, his usual calm and serene aura like an elixir that instantly cured her weariness.
“Why did you come?” Shao Wan asked, steadying herself against a bed post, hoping he would say because of you, but expecting it was more likely related to official business, to Donghua, to Celestial-Demon affairs. Besides, he was probably very angry with her for just leaving.
“To check on your security,” Mo Yuan said and came to his legs smoothly. “I find it gravely lacking. Didn’t Donghua promise to guard you with his life? I was able to walk right in.”
“Hmm… yes. Well….,” Shao Wan stuttered. So he had come because of her. He wasn’t angry? Why did she feel so flustered? Her hands dashed up to her head to check her hair. She remembered, the maids had washed, oiled and braided it this morning. It was probably looking more in order than it had for all the time they had spent in the mortal realm together.
“Should you not… take care of important things… Celestial business? The… realms?” she stuttered.
“I’m all done with that,” Mo Yuan replied evenly. “For the moment.”
“It’s a long way to come to the Demon realm just to check on my security.”
Mo Yuan shrugged. “Not that far.”
Not that far for a somebody who jumped clouds as reckless and fast as him, that was true.
“Is there something… you want?”
Mo Yuan just looked at her with those midnight black eyes like this was the most senseless question he had ever heard.
“Have you forgotten things again?” he asked with a frown, “Zhe Yan said that should have stopped. Of course I want to see you, you silly woman. Did you think you could run away and be done with me so easily?”
Slightly shaking his wrist with the tether that still connected them, he stepped right in front of her. His presence was overpowering, her knees started shaking. Celestials felt Celestial powers differently than Demons and if this was how Celestial women felt in his presence, no wonder they had fallen over themselves trying to bed him back at school.
His lips were on hers before she could take a deep enough breath to prepare herself. They were soft at first, but got more demanding fast. His tongue sought entry into her mouth and she granted it, welcomed it, marvelled at his urgency, his fervor, the way his breath quickened and his body reacted to her.
His hands went to her lower back and pulled her towards himself, trying to mold her body to his despite her belly that carried the result of their passion, their children, their future. She threw her arms around his neck, the only thought she was capable of being I love you, I love you, I love you, echoed by a ghost of a thought that told her she was utterly doomed.
“Take off your clothes,” he whispered breathlessly when he detached from her, “I want to see your body.”
“But I am…”
“More beautiful by the day,” he breathed.
In hindsight, she was glad Donghua chose that very moment to appear and wasn’t delayed by five more minutes because by the gods, she was ready to rip off her clothes to submit to this man entirely, naked body and soul, with no restraint whatsoever.
Busting open the door with his feet, his hands full of packages, Donghua declared: “I have found what you sent me to get!” And “Oh,” he added upon recognizing Mo Yuan, “I hope you have eaten already. Though you do seem… hungry.”
“He came to see me,” Shao Wan said happily, stepping away from Mo Yuan’s warmth rather reluctantly, his hands on her equally reluctant to let go.
“Good, good,” Donghua nodded, “and now, he’ll give me an earful for leaving you alone.”
“You mustn’t,” Shao Wan turned to Mo Yuan again, “I sent him on this very important errand. There is one type of Baozi I crave and it’s made on a mortal world. Only he knows where.”
“If that is supposed to appease me, it doesn’t,” Mo Yuan said sourly. He looked at Shao Wan’s belly with a frown. “So I wasn’t mistaken. You sneak off to the mortal realm to hasten your pregnancy on immortal terms?”
He was very perceptive. She looked down on the round mound rather pleased. “It’s not even cheating,” she gloated, “I still need to go through the whole thing. But it won’t tie me down as long in this realm.”
“Does Zhe Yan approve of that?”, Mo Yuan continued. “Isn’t it much more advised if you and them absorb as much immortal energy as possible?”
“Since when do you care whether Zhe Yan approves?” Shao Wan murmured, but very softly. “It’s fine,” she declared louder, “my powers are still completely messed up anyway, but they are very strong. I’m sure it’s the blood.”
“What blood.”
“The blood you g… it wasn’t you?” Shao Wan frowned after catching a glimpse of his face. “Donghua, whose Dragon blood have I been drinking? Can’t be yours, can it.”
“And why is that, Queen?” Donghua frowned at her, “do you think my True Form is a rock?”
“Pah,” Shao Wan scoffed, “I just know your blood wouldn’t taste that good.”
“Whose blood has she been drinking, Donghua?” Mo Yuan demanded to know.
“The Crown Prince’s, of course,” Donghua shrugged. “It’s not my fault you brothers don’t communicate about the essential things. Very pure Celestial dragon blood, no strange poisons or Fox essence in there.”
“Oh.” Shao Wan eyed Mo Yuan apprehensively. She had no energy to fight with him. But apparently, he had no will to fight either. “I see,” he said and, to her surprise, added a satisfied: “good.”
“You should eat the Baozi as long as it’s still fresh,” he nodded towards the steaming delicacies, “let me talk to Donghua in the meantime.”
Donghua put the food on the table, efficiently brushing aside the piles of scrolls.
“Wasn’t that Demon Beau with you?” he asked Mo Yuan. “The Purple Queen told us he went to meet up with the Demon Ancestor in Qing Qiu and Shao Wan has been waiting anxiously ever since for him to come and help her deal with all this,” he gesticulated towards the scrolls with an expression of disdain on his face.
“I sent him on some other business,” Mo Yuan replied curtly. “He has a debt to clear. But it shouldn’t take him too long.” He stepped over to the desk and picked up a scroll, beginning to read it.
Shao Wan lowered herself down, her mouth watering. By the Gods, she was hungry! “Sit next to me,” she murmured, pulling on Mo Yuan’s robe. He glanced down and smiled.
“Let me talk to Donghua first. I’ll be right back.”
She watched him walk over to their friend and start to discuss whatever matter there was in low voices and grave faces. With a frown, she realized that Mo Yuan was wearing his Xuan-Yuan Sword slung to his back, like a travelling warrior. Or like a man who expected to meet trouble. With a sigh, she put her hands around the first perfectly round, white Baozi and lifted it to her mouth. The smell! Open wide and…. mmmmmmmhhhhhhhhh! The meat filled her mouth with its warmth, its juice caressed her mouth with its oily silkiness. Her teeth were almost reluctant to start chewing, but holding out was too difficult. She prolonged the pleasure by taking very small bites and chewing slowly like a turtle.
But even like this, the food was gone too soon and she was left with only the wrappings and a feeling of slight regret.
The men seemed to be done with their talk, Mo Yuan was looking over and then around… summoning a cup of water to his hand before stepping over.
“Here,” he said, “you must be thirsty.”
She took the cup and gulped it down. He had a second in his hand for her when she set the first cup down.
Something she could get used to.
A wild thought raced through her head. What if he came here for good? They could be Demon Overlords together. That fantasy… she had had it before. Long before she had realized that she loved him. That she wanted to spend her life with him. If… if she… if she could conquer the Madness. If.
Mo Yuan bent down a little. He extended his hand and brushed his thumb down from the corners of her mouth and across her chin. She followed it with her tongue to lick away the remnants of the food she had just consumed.
“Are you feeling better?” he asked.
Well, she was. But something was still missing. She threw a look over to where Donghua had been, only to find him gone. Sometimes, he was surprisingly tactful for someone as cold as him.
“Can you stay?” she asked, suddenly a bit breathless. “For the night?”
“Yes,” Mo Yuan answered, taking the sword off his back, balancing it carefully against the wall, lowering himself down, sitting behind her so that she could lean against him.
She put her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes. His arms came around her body, to rest on her belly. He was warm and solid, a support she had always needed but never hoped she would get. Coming back here to her Palace had reminded her of how hard it was to be in a position of power and not stray from the right path, to remain in that position and not fall.
“You have redecorated a bit,” he remarked, sounding amused.
Oh! Correct, he had stayed in this room when he had lived here! His smell had lingered when she had arrived, driving tears of longing into her eyes.
“It was too empty,” she smiled, glad she could smell the real him now, “I’m not a frugal person.”
“It never quite felt like your room,” he said quietly, “but now it does.”
His one hand detached itself from her and hovered over her throat. “Your Feather!” he remarked.
“Yes,” she said, “I got it back! When I got my memories back, I remembered: I had hidden it here at the Palace before… before the final battle.”
“Before going to the Soulswappers,” he surmised.
“Yes,” she admitted, “they would have demanded it from me. And you know… that I cannot allow it in the wrong hands.”
She had almost killed him over this item, the true location and channel of her powers. Her greatest asset, her greatest vulnerability… and now, Mo Yuan was the only person should could imagine giving it to for safekeeping.
“You went into the last battle without your powers,” he said, sadness making his voice heavy.
“Well, the point was to use my fire to purge the realms of all bad things,” she shrugged, “my powers would not have made much of a difference.”
His breast heaved in a silent sigh. But she had little interest in thinking sad thoughts about an undoubtedly sad occasion. He had told her before how much he regretted everything and she had told him before that he had done exactly what she had planned for him to do - for once! No resistance! No overthinking! - and that this way, it had all worked out.
“I have been negotiating with Shǒu for days,” she sighed, changing the topic, “it is cumbersome.”
Mo Yuan made a low sound in his throat, almost inaudible. Shao Wan sighed. That fight in those pits… Golden Dragon against that Abomination… it still made her heart beat faster in panic when she thought back. He must feel much more passionately about it. For all she knew of him, he was quite unforgiving.
“He has many things that belong to the Celestial Tribe,” Mo Yuan remarked drily. “I will get them back.”
“He’s a businessman,” she said, thinking she had to make sure Mo Yuan would not meet Shǒu by accident tomorrow, “I can deal with those, and he has some honor, it just takes so much time.”
“Negotiating for troops?” he asked quietly.
“Yes, mainly,” she nodded and suppressed a yawn. “Troops and information. On my potential enemies. Things changed a lot after the war. I need to understand whom I can trust and whom to be wary of.”
“Be wary of the Green Tribe,” Mo Yuan said sharply.
She turned her head to catch a glimpse of his face. “Yu Dian? No, him I actually need. His father… he used to be...”
“I will not let any of those Soulswappers live, Shao Wan,” Mo Yuan cut her off, with that voice of his that she had come to associate with “don’t even try to discuss this any further.”
“Because they tortured you?” she asked.
“No,” he answered, “because their magic is going against the Laws of the Universe and I am tasked by my Father to be the Protector of the Realms. And because they are to blame for your predicament.”
Shao Wan sighed. No, she still had no energy to fight with him. This discussion had to be had another day, but it would be had. She put her head back on his shoulder and sank back a little more.
“Are you very tired?” he whispered.
By the Gods, she was. It was like the little strength she had had left was leaving her, now that he was here.
“Yes,” she said, “I am sorry.” She added that with some regret. He had come all this way just to see her and now she wasn’t even able to satisfy him.
“I will put you in bed,” he said, “come. I will carry you.”
“No,” she said, “let us stay like this a little longer.”
Warm and solid. Someone who had her back. Someone to support her. Someone who would be there if she needed advise or be to be scolded for bad decisions.
“Mo Yuan,” she said, feeling how sleep was coming on forcefully, “please, I need to talk to you about something very important in the morning. Don’t just leave. Please.”
He chuckled. “Silly woman. I won’t leave. I have a whole list of important things to discuss with you.”
Oh?
“For example,” he added, “the person who designed the Demon Tower… is he dead or is he alive?”
Sleep definitely became elusive after this. Because if he had found the Tower Engineer - there was hope. There was more hope than she would have thought possible.
Chapter 54a